part 6:
Enter Troop 42! Girl Scouts Arrive
at the Church in the Acres
written by Aaron Abdowmassy
story by Matthew Atanian
©1998 by Aaron Abdowmassy and Matthew Atanian
Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
Enter Troop 42! Girl Scouts Arrive
at the Church in the Acres
written by Aaron Abdowmassy
story by Matthew Atanian
©1998 by Aaron Abdowmassy and Matthew Atanian
Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
It was a gloomy day, an "I know I ought to get off of my duff and do something, but I just don't want to" type of day. The sky was just the wrong shade of gray, the humidity just a little too low, the wind blowing just a little too east. Today was the time of the year between summer and fall when it was too cold to do anything fun, but too hot not to do anything fun. Generally, it was a boring type of day. It was also the type of day when fates change, and destinies come into focus.
Well, maybe not. But it was a boring day, to be certain.
Matthew K. Atanian (a.k.a. "Matt") wheeled his bike into the Church in the Acres' parking lot. Clad in his red, patch-covered coat, wearing the puke-olive green Boy Scout pants, and capped with his trademarked wide-brim hat, Matt was ready for anything that could possibly happen on this day, the first day of the new Scouting year.
Approaching his father's van (Matt had ridden his bike, as his father had to leave shortly for another meeting), Matt noticed that there were an awful lot of girls present on this gloomy, unfriendly day. Large numbers of women were not an unusual sight at Troop meetings. Indeed, they were expected. Most of the members of the Troop were not old enough to drive, and those who could didn't have licensees. It was expected that one of the parents would provide a ride for the Scout, and usually the mother did it, most likely so she could gossip with her friends. However, while large numbers of grown, motherly women were commonplace, large numbers of girls wearing blue skirts and sashes with white blouses were far from ordinary.
Matt's dad stepped out of the van, and Matt approached him with a questioning gaze. "What are all these girl scouts doing here?" he asked.
His father turned to him with all the regal weight that many years of service as a former lodge advisor gave to a man. He looked Matt in the eye and said, "I told you last night, Matt. They're the Troop of Girl Scouts, Troop 42, which the Church has invited to meet here. They'll meet downstairs, but I have the feeling we'll be working together closely over the next few weeks, maybe for longer." He paused, and then looked at Matt impatiently. "I told you all this last night."
"You never said that," Matt said.
His father started to say something then swallowed it, shaking his head. Instead he said, "Meet me inside soon. We've got to do a pre-opening on patches."
Matt nodded absently, but all of his attention was drawn to one of the leaders.
She had a slender figure that was well proportioned, with nicely tanned skin and a face with elegantly sculpted features. Her eyes burned with a fiery competence and spoke of deep intelligence. Framing her face was a mane of red hair that was presently done up in a bun on which rested her Girl Scout cap. She was wearing a uniform, not a bikini, but Matt had no trouble recognizing her from before.
Matt was standing there, staring blankly in the direction of the field, and didn't realize that Aaron, Bill (a.k.a. "Hughes"), Billy (a.k.a. "Gelinas"), and Mike (a.k.a. "Squid" [don't ask]) were approaching. Aaron called to Matt and greeted him in friendly fashion and then saw the terror in Matt's eyes.
He turned to the others, "He isn't taking it well."
Hughes, on the other hand, was far less dramatic. "Hey Matt," he hooted cheerily, "we've got Girl Scouts."
Matt continued to stare blankly at nothing, particularly at the mental image of the woman in his mind. "Oh God," he muttered painfully.
Squid frowned. Then he grinned. "You called?" He frowned again when this did not draw its usual bales of laughter.
Matt's upper lip twitched a bit, but otherwise he continued to stare at nothing.
Gelinas scanned the area for the source of Matt's torment, and Hughes spotted it. "It's the leader."
Squid nodded in recognition as he saw her. "The Madame Man Hater."
Gelinas muttered, "To Hades with the feminists."
For a moment, the group stared at Gelinas; deep, philosophical statements were usually a mist to him. The group's attention quickly returned to Matt as he started to whimper.
Aaron spoke, "Wasn't she the one who called you 'Mr. Testosterone'?"
Matt nodded weakly. "What's she doing here?"
"Well, Matt," Aaron said, "I seriously doubt that she single-handedly convinced her troop to pick up and move here just so she could be closer to you."
Matt shrugged weakly (he seemed to be doing a lot of things weakly, suddenly) and turned his attention back to the Girl Scout leader. She was sitting on the stairs with two other Girl Scouts, whose backs were presently turned to the group. Steeling himself, Matt muttered, "Now's just as great a time to do this as any." Then to the group, "Anyone with me?" Suddenly, everyone had things to do. Squid and Gelinas hurried inside, shouting that they had to plan the meeting for tonight. Hughes backed away slowly claiming that he was "allergic to feminists". Aaron, being the only one who stayed behind, was still not going to let Mat rope him into this one.
"Sorry, Matt," he apologized, holding up his hands, "but she scares me more than she scares you. I can stay here and wait for you if you want."
Matt grimaced. Small consolation, he thought. Instead, he said, "Thanks. Time to face my demons."
With a weak grin, Matt squared his shoulders, straightened his uniform, tested his breath, and started off toward the girls.
"That is one brave, stupid man," Aaron muttered.
Matt approached the three girls slowly, with a measured pace, and a more-than-normal straightness to his posture. Perhaps she would have forgotten the first time he had laid eyes on her. He sure hadn't, but there was always a chance.
None of the three appeared to notice him on his way over, but the one from camp looked up as he neared them, and muttered something that Matt thought was meant to be derogatory. Her fiery eyes looked him over once, swiftly, widened for a moment in recognition, and then regarded him with a deep-rooted malevolence. One of the two smaller girls noticed, and nudged the other who was still talking in the ribs.
All three were now regarding Matt with heavy, weighing gazes.
The eldest appeared to be contemplating the best way of ridding herself of him, as if he was a parasite she had just found clinging to her leg. One of the girls – who appeared to be twins – was regarding him with a measuring gaze, looking for a weakness to exploit, as if they were opponents in a duel. The third was the least malevolent. She regarded him with a measuring gaze as well, but hers was more friendly, a considerate, searching look, exploring his character.
Matt broke the heavy silence that had descended upon the group. "Uh, hi. I don't know if you remember me or not. I'm Matt. Matt Atanian."
"I remember you, all right. Mr. Testosterone from summer camp. Just my luck we'd meet again." She was very sarcastic in her last sentence.
One of the twins snickered, a grin on her face. The other made a shushing sound, and frowned at her twin.
"I see you do remember me," Matt said disheartedly. "There goes my hope for a fresh start."
The eldest nodded, though whether to herself or to Matt would remain unclear for years to come. "Say, why don't you go away so we can some fresh air?"
One of the twins laughed this time, and the other frowned at her leader.
Matt wasn't a genius, but he sure wasn't stupid. He knew when he was burned, and when he would look like a fool if he pursued further. With a heavy heart, Matt turned around and headed in some random direction, with shoulders slumped and a sad grin on his face.
Aaron decided to observe the confrontation from a safe distance; basically, as far away he could get from the battle zone without appearing to be cowardly or deserting Matt.
He sat down on a log at the opposite end of the parking lot, watching carefully. Matt was slowly approaching the trio, and just as Matt reached them, Jon Becker (a.k.a. "Becker", no relation to local movie critic Sy Becker) stepped in front of Aaron's field of vision. With a stupid smile on his face, a box of Magic cards in one hand, and a Scout Handbook in the other, Becker greeted Aaron.
"Hi there!" he said in an over-loud voice.
"Get out of the way, you stupid–" Aaron began, but then he noticed the headphones on Becker's ears.
"What?" Becker asked in that over-loud voice again.
Aaron sighed, grunted, spit, hissed, cursed, did a little jig, sat down, cursed, twitched, cursed, and finally pushed Becker away. He was just able to catch Matt walking away in a "poor, poor, pitiful me" manner. The trio was consulting with one another, and Aaron could not quite tell what they were saying; hell, they were at least fifty yards away, and their faces were hidden in a huddle.
Aaron watched Matt for a moment, and realized that it hadn't gone well. For a moment he thanked himself for not having been there, then cursed himself for deserting Matt, and then thanked himself again. He went to rejoin Matt, but didn't advance more than three steps, as Matt had disappeared around a corner.
For a moment Aaron considered searching for Matt, but he decided to walk inside and get ready for the onslaught of mischievous little children that would be attending tonight's meeting. He lost himself in thought, and didn't realize that one of the trio was walking beside him until she tapped him on the shoulder. Aaron's head jerked up from its slouched position, and he took his hand away from his chin, realizing that he had been tugging his stubble again.
He turned his head to face the girl. Nearly as tall as he was, the girl was attractive even in her Girl Scout uniform. Her skin was a pale cream colour, and her large, green eyes were mounted nicely on an attractive, youthful face. Her hair was pale brown and of undeterminable length, as it was tucked underneath her hat. Her full, red lips were turned down slightly, but she did not appear to be pouting; instead it gave her an air of undeterable independence. Her slim, petite figure was highlighted by a snug fitting uniform, but she didn't appear to be flaunting. She carried an air about her, an air of self-assurance, highlighted by the way she held herself and the way she walked.
For a moment Aaron was taken in by her appearance, and then he realized what a fool he must have looked like. He stopped, and turned his entire body to face her. The corners of her mouth turned upward slightly in what might have been a smart grin.
"Hi there!" she said, in an open and warm fashion.
"Uh, hi." Aaron replied hesitantly. What the hell is she doing? he wondered, as he often did when attractive women approached him openly. Usually, when they did, it was to ask him whether or not this test answer was correct, what the homework for the night was, or to demand that he loan them money – which, while it may have scored points for him with them, he never did. This left him totally dumbfounded, and it took him another moment to realize what he said.
"Um, hi," he repeated, just to make sure he had said it.
The girl grinned smartly again. She had clearly seen it in his eyes; he was going to have to work on that. "No, I'm not here to squeeze money out of you. My name's Kirstin. Kirstin Porter."
"Um, hi," Aaron repeated. Hell, it had worked so far; Kirstin was still talking to him, she hadn't hit him yet. A famous quote came to mind, one that he based his life on: The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
"I see the rumours are true," Kirstin said half to herself.
Aaron frowned at this. So, the attractive girl who was talking to him had heard of him before. Most unusual. He said the only thing he could possibly think of. "I think you have the wrong person."
Kirstin eyed him up and down, then centred her gaze back on his eyes. "Nope, you match the description. And unless that isn't your name tag, you are Aaron Ab-ab-abdowmassy."
Aaron didn't bother to correct her pronunciation of his last name; God knew how he tired of it. Besides, here was an attractive, intelligent girl who had heard of him and was actually looking for him; he wouldn't dare risk blowing it.
Suddenly, time froze. Aaron was sucked into a vortex of his own consciousness, and the mind in his head spoke to him with a deep Scottish accent like that of Sean Connery. Aaron, it said, are you stupid, man? She's just another girl! She has no interest in you, so stop acting like a wool headed lummox and be yourself! Talk to her, damn you! Be you-- and abruptly the voice was silenced as Aaron shut it up. He slid back to himself.
"Oh, I guess I am," he said, trying to recover his lost pride. He grinned at Kirstin, and this time it was a smart grin to rival her own. "Mind if we start over?"
She looked at him with a slightly puzzled, slightly amused smile on her lips. "Sure," she agreed hesitantly.
Aaron walked several steps backward, and Kirstin turned toward him. She walked forward and smiled. "Hi, there!"
Aaron nodded his head slightly in her direction, a dip of the upper torso that barely passed as bow.
Kirstin nodded again, and said, "You must be Aaron Ab-ab– oh, you must be Aaron."
Aaron looked at his nametag and smiled. "Ah, I must be. What can I do you for?"
A chuckle rose from Kirstin, and she said, "Nothing as of this instant, but maybe something soon."
Aaron got the jitters for a moment, and almost got sucked back into that damned nexus of his, but then Kirstin clarified herself. "It depends on whether or not you know Matthew Atanian."
Aaron put two and two together, and instead of getting his usual five, he realized that this was one of the three girls that Matt confronted. He considered his answer for moment, then responded, "I know him, well enough." That should have been enough for her to realize that they were associates, but it would have left room for questions concerning friendship. Aaron was a good friend of Matt, last he checked, but one had to be careful with unspoken questions like that.
Kirstin merely nodded. "Well, in that case, I guess I can ask you this: is he really a jerk?"
The question caught Aaron slightly off guard. "Excuse me?"
"Is Matt a jerk?"
Aaron frowned, and observed the ground at his feet for a moment. "Is Matt a jerk..." he repeated quietly. He looked back at Kirstin. "Nope."
Again, she nodded. "As I thought, Sarah over reacted again."
Aaron put two and two together successfully again. "I take it Sarah is the leader."
"That she is," Kirstin responded. "She's my sister."
Aaron hmmmed softly. "I don't see much resemblance."
Kirstin giggled softly. "Not many people do. Be nice, though. She has been slightly, shall we say, irritable since Rodney, her last boyfriend, cheated on her.
"Ah, well, she'll get over it soon enough," Aaron said, hoping to change the topic.
"Not likely," Kirstin said. Her tone was becoming slightly distant, as though she was thinking deeply. "It has been an annoying and violent three months since."
"Ah. So. Who was the other girl with you? I didn't quite see her face clearly."
Kirstin giggled again. "She's my other sister. My twin sister."
Aaron absorbed this slowly. "Is she like yourself?"
"Not at all, thankfully," came the hasty response. Aaron gathered that he was on dangerous ground now. Like an idiot, he decided to play it out a bit more, to get a little more information.
"Why thankfully?"
"No reason," Kirstin said. Aaron could picture little flames in her eyes, the way she was speaking.
"Ah. Why do you want to know whether Matt is a jerk or not? Is it important?"
Kirstin smiled. "Not important to me... maybe to a certain irritable sister, but not to me . . ."
Aaron's eyes widened in understanding.
"Is Matt available?" Kirstin asked.
Again, Aaron considered his words for a moment. "He is, last I heard."
Kirstin absorbed this, and then tapped her lip in thought. "You are friends with Matt, correct?"
Aaron decided to play along. "Perhaps."
"So, you know what kind of a person Matt is, right?"
Aaron nodded.
"And I know what kind of a person Sarah is, right? So, I was thinking . . ."
"But you hardly know either of us!" Aaron blurted out.
"I know, but I think Matt is right for her." Kirstin smiled again. "Call it a sixth sense."
Aaron shook his head slowly, marvelling at her intelligence. "If Sarah finds out, it'll be your head, not mine."
Kirstin giggled. "Of course. But, then again, you don't know her, right? Well, I don't know Matt."
Plausible deniability, Aaron realized. God, it was too good. "Thing is, Matt should probably know about this. He's got a certain... attraction to her."
Kirstin looked at Aaron as if to say duh, but instead said, "Then it's settled."
"It is."
"By the way," Kirstin asked, "I just met you. You don't know me. So why are you helping me cheer up my sister?"
Aaron considered this for a long second. "Oh, I don't know, honestly. Maybe because it's in Matt's best interests as well? I don't know." He grinned. "Call it a sixth sense."
"Thanks, Aaron." Kirstin smiled warmly, then checked her digital watch. "Oh, crud. The meeting's already started."
Aaron looked around, realizing that he was alone with her in the parking lot. The damnable adult leaders had neglected to remind him to come in. "I guess we should head in."
The two walked to the door, and Aaron held it open for her. As Kirstin passed him and headed toward her meeting room, Aaron grinned, and didn't notice as she slipped a folded piece of paper in his Handbook. Turning, unaware of the paper, Aaron headed upstairs to the meeting.
Later that evening, Gelinas and Squid attempted unsuccessfully to return a semblance of order to the Troop. As always, all but the most senior members of the Troop were acting like the primates that they descended from, and several in particular were being extremely annoying. Bill raised his hands with the middle three fingers raised, but it didn't work. Squid raised his voice to an exponential number of decibels and hollered "SIGNS UP!" but it had no effect.
The adult leaders of the Troop were their usual uncooperative selves – all excluding Matt – and most were hiding in the kitchen at this moment. Those adults who were available were either talking idly among themselves, and those who weren't were talking were shaking their heads in disgust at the complete inability of the Troop's youth leaders to bring order.
Eventually the youth leaders gave up and let nature take its course. The adult leaders would invariably complain about this, and the youth leaders would continue to blame the adults' lack of assistance; however, all the gold in the world would not get the Scouts to fall into order, so it was pointless to stand against them.
Squid and Gelinas, tired and defeated, walked over to where Matt was sitting. Aaron came up the stairs, from a merit badge conference, and walked over to the group. Aaron sat down on the stair next to Squid; Gelinas sat on the table in front of them. Hughes walked over from out of the chaos, and sat down on the table next to Gelinas. The table creaked loudly, and there was a loud snapping sound, which persuaded Gelinas and Hughes to sit down on the stairs with the rest of the group.
Matt was sitting with shoulders slumped, head lowered. His arms were limp and he was generally unresponsive to anyone. Aaron, on the other hand, was wearing an awkward grin on his face, a Han Solo-ish twist to his mouth. He was in good spirits, for some reason that even he was not quite sure of. Squid was noticeable irritable, and Gelinas was idly examining the room. Hughes was thinking about gypsies and griffins, and had a twisted smile on his face.
"So, you gonna tell us what happened with Sarah?" Aaron asked Matt.
The rest of the group looked at Aaron, and Hughes spoke for all of them when he said, "Who's Sarah?"
Aaron nodded to himself, realizing his mistake. "Ah, I apologize. Sarah is the Girl Scout leader."
The group nodded in unison, all except Matt, who whimpered softly.
"Sorry, Matt," Aaron said. "I guess that was a stupid question, huh?"
Matt looked at him sideways. "You could say that."
"Oh, come on," Hughes chided. "It couldn't have gone that bad."
Matt related what had happened in as vivid of detail as he could. He finished, and put his head on the corner of the table in front of him. "It was the stuff nightmares are made of."
"I guess I was wrong," Hughes conceded.
Matt's only response was the soft, steady thud of his forehead against the tabletop.
The meeting ended, and the gang headed outside. The sky had long since gone gray, and heavy clouds had moved in. The air had become slightly more humid, the sun had become cooler, and the barometric pressure had lowered dramatically. No animal life was to be seen outside, and the trees were bundling up as if in preparation for a storm. The strongest sign of foul weather, however, was the assurance given the citizens of Springfield by their weathermen, promising clear and sunny skies.
The quintet waited for their mothers and fathers to arrive, all except Matt, who provided his own transportation. Squid said, "You know what I think?" Before anyone could respond, he continued, "Probably not."
"Why don't we get together and play Magic this weekend?" Gelinas asked. "It could be fun, and we could take our minds off the Girl Scouts."
Hughes, always the volunteer, said cheerfully, "Great idea! When should I be at your house, Bill?"
Gelinas threw up his hands in protest, and Aaron interjected, "Why don't we meet over my house. My dad's going to be away, and my two little brothers are going to be at their friends' houses. Mom won't mind."
The group agreed. "Then it's settled. Meet me at my house around four on Saturday. Come with your sleeping bags, and bring some videos and anime. Oh yeah, bring lots of Magic cards, too. Enough to play Ironman."
The group gasped in unison. "Just kidding," Aaron laughed.
Slowly the group left as their parents got there. Matt was the only one left, and the sky was even darker now. Then, in a single crash of thunder, the entire sky fell down on him in one large, wet, brick. It wasn't like normal rain that falls gradually; it was literally one large sheet of rain, some three inches thick, that drenched him and everything around him. Nothing came before it, and nothing followed it. The rain just fell in one heavy sheet.
Matty cursed. She hadn't gotten out of there quick enough. As she started away, thankful for the coat she wore, she was frozen in his tracks by a familiar voice.
"Where are you going, Mr. Testosterone?"
Matty turned to see Sarah Porter. Behind her stood her two sisters. Oh no, Matty thought. If she sees me like this, I'm through. I'll just try to play it off. Matty turned slowly. "Uh, what?"
"Oh, I'm sorry." Sarah looked surprised. "I... I thought you were someone else. Sorry about this."
Matty smiled shyly. "That's OK. If you'll excuse me, I—"
Sarah didn't hear her. "My name's Sarah Porter. You are...?"
Matty hesitated. "Hayes... Matty Hayes."
Sarah smiled. "Nice to meet you, uh, Matty."
Kirstin was looking at Matty strangely, and her eyes widened in surprise as she caught sight of something barely visible under Matty's unbuttoned coat.
Matty smiled weakly, and started to say, "Well, if you'll excuse me—"
"You're with the Boy Scouts?"
"Uh, yeah," Matty tried to come up with some excuse to get the out of there. "I really—"
"You should join the Girl Scouts. Not that I have anything against the Boy Scouts, but they've got some serious perverts that they need to weed out." Sarah looked Matty over for a moment. "Say, no offense, right, but you look a lot like that Atanian pervert. Are you related?"
That was Matty's cue to tree and split, or something like that. She got on her bike and rode away swiftly. "I'm sorry," she called behind her, "but I need to get home and change!"
Sarah followed Matty's departure, and then sighed. "Strange girl," she muttered, and headed back to her car.
From behind the large wooden platform in the field, a lone figure watched the happenings outside of the church. Although his robes were soaked to the core, the man pulled them tighter around himself.
"So, those are the latest victims of the Jusenkyo curse," he said softly. "The day shall come when I can reveal myself to them safely, but now is not the time or place.
Slowly the man turned and walked away, searching for the edge of a shadow. The small ornamental bell hanging from his rope belt jingled softly, and was the only sound to mark his passage.
Well, maybe not. But it was a boring day, to be certain.
Matthew K. Atanian (a.k.a. "Matt") wheeled his bike into the Church in the Acres' parking lot. Clad in his red, patch-covered coat, wearing the puke-olive green Boy Scout pants, and capped with his trademarked wide-brim hat, Matt was ready for anything that could possibly happen on this day, the first day of the new Scouting year.
Approaching his father's van (Matt had ridden his bike, as his father had to leave shortly for another meeting), Matt noticed that there were an awful lot of girls present on this gloomy, unfriendly day. Large numbers of women were not an unusual sight at Troop meetings. Indeed, they were expected. Most of the members of the Troop were not old enough to drive, and those who could didn't have licensees. It was expected that one of the parents would provide a ride for the Scout, and usually the mother did it, most likely so she could gossip with her friends. However, while large numbers of grown, motherly women were commonplace, large numbers of girls wearing blue skirts and sashes with white blouses were far from ordinary.
Matt's dad stepped out of the van, and Matt approached him with a questioning gaze. "What are all these girl scouts doing here?" he asked.
His father turned to him with all the regal weight that many years of service as a former lodge advisor gave to a man. He looked Matt in the eye and said, "I told you last night, Matt. They're the Troop of Girl Scouts, Troop 42, which the Church has invited to meet here. They'll meet downstairs, but I have the feeling we'll be working together closely over the next few weeks, maybe for longer." He paused, and then looked at Matt impatiently. "I told you all this last night."
"You never said that," Matt said.
His father started to say something then swallowed it, shaking his head. Instead he said, "Meet me inside soon. We've got to do a pre-opening on patches."
Matt nodded absently, but all of his attention was drawn to one of the leaders.
She had a slender figure that was well proportioned, with nicely tanned skin and a face with elegantly sculpted features. Her eyes burned with a fiery competence and spoke of deep intelligence. Framing her face was a mane of red hair that was presently done up in a bun on which rested her Girl Scout cap. She was wearing a uniform, not a bikini, but Matt had no trouble recognizing her from before.
Matt was standing there, staring blankly in the direction of the field, and didn't realize that Aaron, Bill (a.k.a. "Hughes"), Billy (a.k.a. "Gelinas"), and Mike (a.k.a. "Squid" [don't ask]) were approaching. Aaron called to Matt and greeted him in friendly fashion and then saw the terror in Matt's eyes.
He turned to the others, "He isn't taking it well."
Hughes, on the other hand, was far less dramatic. "Hey Matt," he hooted cheerily, "we've got Girl Scouts."
Matt continued to stare blankly at nothing, particularly at the mental image of the woman in his mind. "Oh God," he muttered painfully.
Squid frowned. Then he grinned. "You called?" He frowned again when this did not draw its usual bales of laughter.
Matt's upper lip twitched a bit, but otherwise he continued to stare at nothing.
Gelinas scanned the area for the source of Matt's torment, and Hughes spotted it. "It's the leader."
Squid nodded in recognition as he saw her. "The Madame Man Hater."
Gelinas muttered, "To Hades with the feminists."
For a moment, the group stared at Gelinas; deep, philosophical statements were usually a mist to him. The group's attention quickly returned to Matt as he started to whimper.
Aaron spoke, "Wasn't she the one who called you 'Mr. Testosterone'?"
Matt nodded weakly. "What's she doing here?"
"Well, Matt," Aaron said, "I seriously doubt that she single-handedly convinced her troop to pick up and move here just so she could be closer to you."
Matt shrugged weakly (he seemed to be doing a lot of things weakly, suddenly) and turned his attention back to the Girl Scout leader. She was sitting on the stairs with two other Girl Scouts, whose backs were presently turned to the group. Steeling himself, Matt muttered, "Now's just as great a time to do this as any." Then to the group, "Anyone with me?" Suddenly, everyone had things to do. Squid and Gelinas hurried inside, shouting that they had to plan the meeting for tonight. Hughes backed away slowly claiming that he was "allergic to feminists". Aaron, being the only one who stayed behind, was still not going to let Mat rope him into this one.
"Sorry, Matt," he apologized, holding up his hands, "but she scares me more than she scares you. I can stay here and wait for you if you want."
Matt grimaced. Small consolation, he thought. Instead, he said, "Thanks. Time to face my demons."
With a weak grin, Matt squared his shoulders, straightened his uniform, tested his breath, and started off toward the girls.
"That is one brave, stupid man," Aaron muttered.
Matt approached the three girls slowly, with a measured pace, and a more-than-normal straightness to his posture. Perhaps she would have forgotten the first time he had laid eyes on her. He sure hadn't, but there was always a chance.
None of the three appeared to notice him on his way over, but the one from camp looked up as he neared them, and muttered something that Matt thought was meant to be derogatory. Her fiery eyes looked him over once, swiftly, widened for a moment in recognition, and then regarded him with a deep-rooted malevolence. One of the two smaller girls noticed, and nudged the other who was still talking in the ribs.
All three were now regarding Matt with heavy, weighing gazes.
The eldest appeared to be contemplating the best way of ridding herself of him, as if he was a parasite she had just found clinging to her leg. One of the girls – who appeared to be twins – was regarding him with a measuring gaze, looking for a weakness to exploit, as if they were opponents in a duel. The third was the least malevolent. She regarded him with a measuring gaze as well, but hers was more friendly, a considerate, searching look, exploring his character.
Matt broke the heavy silence that had descended upon the group. "Uh, hi. I don't know if you remember me or not. I'm Matt. Matt Atanian."
"I remember you, all right. Mr. Testosterone from summer camp. Just my luck we'd meet again." She was very sarcastic in her last sentence.
One of the twins snickered, a grin on her face. The other made a shushing sound, and frowned at her twin.
"I see you do remember me," Matt said disheartedly. "There goes my hope for a fresh start."
The eldest nodded, though whether to herself or to Matt would remain unclear for years to come. "Say, why don't you go away so we can some fresh air?"
One of the twins laughed this time, and the other frowned at her leader.
Matt wasn't a genius, but he sure wasn't stupid. He knew when he was burned, and when he would look like a fool if he pursued further. With a heavy heart, Matt turned around and headed in some random direction, with shoulders slumped and a sad grin on his face.
Aaron decided to observe the confrontation from a safe distance; basically, as far away he could get from the battle zone without appearing to be cowardly or deserting Matt.
He sat down on a log at the opposite end of the parking lot, watching carefully. Matt was slowly approaching the trio, and just as Matt reached them, Jon Becker (a.k.a. "Becker", no relation to local movie critic Sy Becker) stepped in front of Aaron's field of vision. With a stupid smile on his face, a box of Magic cards in one hand, and a Scout Handbook in the other, Becker greeted Aaron.
"Hi there!" he said in an over-loud voice.
"Get out of the way, you stupid–" Aaron began, but then he noticed the headphones on Becker's ears.
"What?" Becker asked in that over-loud voice again.
Aaron sighed, grunted, spit, hissed, cursed, did a little jig, sat down, cursed, twitched, cursed, and finally pushed Becker away. He was just able to catch Matt walking away in a "poor, poor, pitiful me" manner. The trio was consulting with one another, and Aaron could not quite tell what they were saying; hell, they were at least fifty yards away, and their faces were hidden in a huddle.
Aaron watched Matt for a moment, and realized that it hadn't gone well. For a moment he thanked himself for not having been there, then cursed himself for deserting Matt, and then thanked himself again. He went to rejoin Matt, but didn't advance more than three steps, as Matt had disappeared around a corner.
For a moment Aaron considered searching for Matt, but he decided to walk inside and get ready for the onslaught of mischievous little children that would be attending tonight's meeting. He lost himself in thought, and didn't realize that one of the trio was walking beside him until she tapped him on the shoulder. Aaron's head jerked up from its slouched position, and he took his hand away from his chin, realizing that he had been tugging his stubble again.
He turned his head to face the girl. Nearly as tall as he was, the girl was attractive even in her Girl Scout uniform. Her skin was a pale cream colour, and her large, green eyes were mounted nicely on an attractive, youthful face. Her hair was pale brown and of undeterminable length, as it was tucked underneath her hat. Her full, red lips were turned down slightly, but she did not appear to be pouting; instead it gave her an air of undeterable independence. Her slim, petite figure was highlighted by a snug fitting uniform, but she didn't appear to be flaunting. She carried an air about her, an air of self-assurance, highlighted by the way she held herself and the way she walked.
For a moment Aaron was taken in by her appearance, and then he realized what a fool he must have looked like. He stopped, and turned his entire body to face her. The corners of her mouth turned upward slightly in what might have been a smart grin.
"Hi there!" she said, in an open and warm fashion.
"Uh, hi." Aaron replied hesitantly. What the hell is she doing? he wondered, as he often did when attractive women approached him openly. Usually, when they did, it was to ask him whether or not this test answer was correct, what the homework for the night was, or to demand that he loan them money – which, while it may have scored points for him with them, he never did. This left him totally dumbfounded, and it took him another moment to realize what he said.
"Um, hi," he repeated, just to make sure he had said it.
The girl grinned smartly again. She had clearly seen it in his eyes; he was going to have to work on that. "No, I'm not here to squeeze money out of you. My name's Kirstin. Kirstin Porter."
"Um, hi," Aaron repeated. Hell, it had worked so far; Kirstin was still talking to him, she hadn't hit him yet. A famous quote came to mind, one that he based his life on: The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
"I see the rumours are true," Kirstin said half to herself.
Aaron frowned at this. So, the attractive girl who was talking to him had heard of him before. Most unusual. He said the only thing he could possibly think of. "I think you have the wrong person."
Kirstin eyed him up and down, then centred her gaze back on his eyes. "Nope, you match the description. And unless that isn't your name tag, you are Aaron Ab-ab-abdowmassy."
Aaron didn't bother to correct her pronunciation of his last name; God knew how he tired of it. Besides, here was an attractive, intelligent girl who had heard of him and was actually looking for him; he wouldn't dare risk blowing it.
Suddenly, time froze. Aaron was sucked into a vortex of his own consciousness, and the mind in his head spoke to him with a deep Scottish accent like that of Sean Connery. Aaron, it said, are you stupid, man? She's just another girl! She has no interest in you, so stop acting like a wool headed lummox and be yourself! Talk to her, damn you! Be you-- and abruptly the voice was silenced as Aaron shut it up. He slid back to himself.
"Oh, I guess I am," he said, trying to recover his lost pride. He grinned at Kirstin, and this time it was a smart grin to rival her own. "Mind if we start over?"
She looked at him with a slightly puzzled, slightly amused smile on her lips. "Sure," she agreed hesitantly.
Aaron walked several steps backward, and Kirstin turned toward him. She walked forward and smiled. "Hi, there!"
Aaron nodded his head slightly in her direction, a dip of the upper torso that barely passed as bow.
Kirstin nodded again, and said, "You must be Aaron Ab-ab– oh, you must be Aaron."
Aaron looked at his nametag and smiled. "Ah, I must be. What can I do you for?"
A chuckle rose from Kirstin, and she said, "Nothing as of this instant, but maybe something soon."
Aaron got the jitters for a moment, and almost got sucked back into that damned nexus of his, but then Kirstin clarified herself. "It depends on whether or not you know Matthew Atanian."
Aaron put two and two together, and instead of getting his usual five, he realized that this was one of the three girls that Matt confronted. He considered his answer for moment, then responded, "I know him, well enough." That should have been enough for her to realize that they were associates, but it would have left room for questions concerning friendship. Aaron was a good friend of Matt, last he checked, but one had to be careful with unspoken questions like that.
Kirstin merely nodded. "Well, in that case, I guess I can ask you this: is he really a jerk?"
The question caught Aaron slightly off guard. "Excuse me?"
"Is Matt a jerk?"
Aaron frowned, and observed the ground at his feet for a moment. "Is Matt a jerk..." he repeated quietly. He looked back at Kirstin. "Nope."
Again, she nodded. "As I thought, Sarah over reacted again."
Aaron put two and two together successfully again. "I take it Sarah is the leader."
"That she is," Kirstin responded. "She's my sister."
Aaron hmmmed softly. "I don't see much resemblance."
Kirstin giggled softly. "Not many people do. Be nice, though. She has been slightly, shall we say, irritable since Rodney, her last boyfriend, cheated on her.
"Ah, well, she'll get over it soon enough," Aaron said, hoping to change the topic.
"Not likely," Kirstin said. Her tone was becoming slightly distant, as though she was thinking deeply. "It has been an annoying and violent three months since."
"Ah. So. Who was the other girl with you? I didn't quite see her face clearly."
Kirstin giggled again. "She's my other sister. My twin sister."
Aaron absorbed this slowly. "Is she like yourself?"
"Not at all, thankfully," came the hasty response. Aaron gathered that he was on dangerous ground now. Like an idiot, he decided to play it out a bit more, to get a little more information.
"Why thankfully?"
"No reason," Kirstin said. Aaron could picture little flames in her eyes, the way she was speaking.
"Ah. Why do you want to know whether Matt is a jerk or not? Is it important?"
Kirstin smiled. "Not important to me... maybe to a certain irritable sister, but not to me . . ."
Aaron's eyes widened in understanding.
"Is Matt available?" Kirstin asked.
Again, Aaron considered his words for a moment. "He is, last I heard."
Kirstin absorbed this, and then tapped her lip in thought. "You are friends with Matt, correct?"
Aaron decided to play along. "Perhaps."
"So, you know what kind of a person Matt is, right?"
Aaron nodded.
"And I know what kind of a person Sarah is, right? So, I was thinking . . ."
"But you hardly know either of us!" Aaron blurted out.
"I know, but I think Matt is right for her." Kirstin smiled again. "Call it a sixth sense."
Aaron shook his head slowly, marvelling at her intelligence. "If Sarah finds out, it'll be your head, not mine."
Kirstin giggled. "Of course. But, then again, you don't know her, right? Well, I don't know Matt."
Plausible deniability, Aaron realized. God, it was too good. "Thing is, Matt should probably know about this. He's got a certain... attraction to her."
Kirstin looked at Aaron as if to say duh, but instead said, "Then it's settled."
"It is."
"By the way," Kirstin asked, "I just met you. You don't know me. So why are you helping me cheer up my sister?"
Aaron considered this for a long second. "Oh, I don't know, honestly. Maybe because it's in Matt's best interests as well? I don't know." He grinned. "Call it a sixth sense."
"Thanks, Aaron." Kirstin smiled warmly, then checked her digital watch. "Oh, crud. The meeting's already started."
Aaron looked around, realizing that he was alone with her in the parking lot. The damnable adult leaders had neglected to remind him to come in. "I guess we should head in."
The two walked to the door, and Aaron held it open for her. As Kirstin passed him and headed toward her meeting room, Aaron grinned, and didn't notice as she slipped a folded piece of paper in his Handbook. Turning, unaware of the paper, Aaron headed upstairs to the meeting.
Later that evening, Gelinas and Squid attempted unsuccessfully to return a semblance of order to the Troop. As always, all but the most senior members of the Troop were acting like the primates that they descended from, and several in particular were being extremely annoying. Bill raised his hands with the middle three fingers raised, but it didn't work. Squid raised his voice to an exponential number of decibels and hollered "SIGNS UP!" but it had no effect.
The adult leaders of the Troop were their usual uncooperative selves – all excluding Matt – and most were hiding in the kitchen at this moment. Those adults who were available were either talking idly among themselves, and those who weren't were talking were shaking their heads in disgust at the complete inability of the Troop's youth leaders to bring order.
Eventually the youth leaders gave up and let nature take its course. The adult leaders would invariably complain about this, and the youth leaders would continue to blame the adults' lack of assistance; however, all the gold in the world would not get the Scouts to fall into order, so it was pointless to stand against them.
Squid and Gelinas, tired and defeated, walked over to where Matt was sitting. Aaron came up the stairs, from a merit badge conference, and walked over to the group. Aaron sat down on the stair next to Squid; Gelinas sat on the table in front of them. Hughes walked over from out of the chaos, and sat down on the table next to Gelinas. The table creaked loudly, and there was a loud snapping sound, which persuaded Gelinas and Hughes to sit down on the stairs with the rest of the group.
Matt was sitting with shoulders slumped, head lowered. His arms were limp and he was generally unresponsive to anyone. Aaron, on the other hand, was wearing an awkward grin on his face, a Han Solo-ish twist to his mouth. He was in good spirits, for some reason that even he was not quite sure of. Squid was noticeable irritable, and Gelinas was idly examining the room. Hughes was thinking about gypsies and griffins, and had a twisted smile on his face.
"So, you gonna tell us what happened with Sarah?" Aaron asked Matt.
The rest of the group looked at Aaron, and Hughes spoke for all of them when he said, "Who's Sarah?"
Aaron nodded to himself, realizing his mistake. "Ah, I apologize. Sarah is the Girl Scout leader."
The group nodded in unison, all except Matt, who whimpered softly.
"Sorry, Matt," Aaron said. "I guess that was a stupid question, huh?"
Matt looked at him sideways. "You could say that."
"Oh, come on," Hughes chided. "It couldn't have gone that bad."
Matt related what had happened in as vivid of detail as he could. He finished, and put his head on the corner of the table in front of him. "It was the stuff nightmares are made of."
"I guess I was wrong," Hughes conceded.
Matt's only response was the soft, steady thud of his forehead against the tabletop.
The meeting ended, and the gang headed outside. The sky had long since gone gray, and heavy clouds had moved in. The air had become slightly more humid, the sun had become cooler, and the barometric pressure had lowered dramatically. No animal life was to be seen outside, and the trees were bundling up as if in preparation for a storm. The strongest sign of foul weather, however, was the assurance given the citizens of Springfield by their weathermen, promising clear and sunny skies.
The quintet waited for their mothers and fathers to arrive, all except Matt, who provided his own transportation. Squid said, "You know what I think?" Before anyone could respond, he continued, "Probably not."
"Why don't we get together and play Magic this weekend?" Gelinas asked. "It could be fun, and we could take our minds off the Girl Scouts."
Hughes, always the volunteer, said cheerfully, "Great idea! When should I be at your house, Bill?"
Gelinas threw up his hands in protest, and Aaron interjected, "Why don't we meet over my house. My dad's going to be away, and my two little brothers are going to be at their friends' houses. Mom won't mind."
The group agreed. "Then it's settled. Meet me at my house around four on Saturday. Come with your sleeping bags, and bring some videos and anime. Oh yeah, bring lots of Magic cards, too. Enough to play Ironman."
The group gasped in unison. "Just kidding," Aaron laughed.
Slowly the group left as their parents got there. Matt was the only one left, and the sky was even darker now. Then, in a single crash of thunder, the entire sky fell down on him in one large, wet, brick. It wasn't like normal rain that falls gradually; it was literally one large sheet of rain, some three inches thick, that drenched him and everything around him. Nothing came before it, and nothing followed it. The rain just fell in one heavy sheet.
Matty cursed. She hadn't gotten out of there quick enough. As she started away, thankful for the coat she wore, she was frozen in his tracks by a familiar voice.
"Where are you going, Mr. Testosterone?"
Matty turned to see Sarah Porter. Behind her stood her two sisters. Oh no, Matty thought. If she sees me like this, I'm through. I'll just try to play it off. Matty turned slowly. "Uh, what?"
"Oh, I'm sorry." Sarah looked surprised. "I... I thought you were someone else. Sorry about this."
Matty smiled shyly. "That's OK. If you'll excuse me, I—"
Sarah didn't hear her. "My name's Sarah Porter. You are...?"
Matty hesitated. "Hayes... Matty Hayes."
Sarah smiled. "Nice to meet you, uh, Matty."
Kirstin was looking at Matty strangely, and her eyes widened in surprise as she caught sight of something barely visible under Matty's unbuttoned coat.
Matty smiled weakly, and started to say, "Well, if you'll excuse me—"
"You're with the Boy Scouts?"
"Uh, yeah," Matty tried to come up with some excuse to get the out of there. "I really—"
"You should join the Girl Scouts. Not that I have anything against the Boy Scouts, but they've got some serious perverts that they need to weed out." Sarah looked Matty over for a moment. "Say, no offense, right, but you look a lot like that Atanian pervert. Are you related?"
That was Matty's cue to tree and split, or something like that. She got on her bike and rode away swiftly. "I'm sorry," she called behind her, "but I need to get home and change!"
Sarah followed Matty's departure, and then sighed. "Strange girl," she muttered, and headed back to her car.
From behind the large wooden platform in the field, a lone figure watched the happenings outside of the church. Although his robes were soaked to the core, the man pulled them tighter around himself.
"So, those are the latest victims of the Jusenkyo curse," he said softly. "The day shall come when I can reveal myself to them safely, but now is not the time or place.
Slowly the man turned and walked away, searching for the edge of a shadow. The small ornamental bell hanging from his rope belt jingled softly, and was the only sound to mark his passage.
End Notes:
This story is inspired by the Ranma ½ series created by Takahashi Rumiko.
Most of the characters, except for some of the characters, are based on real people, living, dead, or otherwise. Most of their personalities are kept in tact, but on some occasions they are altered to suit my purposes better. If you don't like it, deal with it. You'll get no sympathy out of me.
This story, as with all the others in this series, was written without the consent of the Boy Scouts of America, the characters, or any mOOse used in the story. If the Boy Scouts of America found out about these stories, they'd probably do unholy things to me, and I'd probably walk bow-legged for several weeks, if I walked again at all.
BACK-STORY: This one deserves a little back-story... Matt wrote this story, and it was pretty good. Not one of his best, but better than some. Anyway, after reading it, I couldn't believe how horribly my character was portrayed. In Matt's version, Aaron is a smooth talking, witty, and generally swift player. He deals with Kirstin quite nicely, and doesn't trip at all.
In real life, that would never happen. Granted, in real life I wouldn't turn into a duck either, but that's beside the point. In the immortal words of King Arthur, "It's the principle of the thing." I had to rewrite it.
What you have (hopefully) just read was the final version of my edit. I took all my scenes and redid them. While I was at it, I redid most of the rest of the story, but I kept the basic underlying plot the same.
That's why the story is credited to Matt but authorship belongs to me. I would enjoy any feedback you'd like to send me. Send it to me at [email protected] and I'll reply ASAP.
Anyway, that's all for now. Hope you enjoyed!
Most of the characters, except for some of the characters, are based on real people, living, dead, or otherwise. Most of their personalities are kept in tact, but on some occasions they are altered to suit my purposes better. If you don't like it, deal with it. You'll get no sympathy out of me.
This story, as with all the others in this series, was written without the consent of the Boy Scouts of America, the characters, or any mOOse used in the story. If the Boy Scouts of America found out about these stories, they'd probably do unholy things to me, and I'd probably walk bow-legged for several weeks, if I walked again at all.
BACK-STORY: This one deserves a little back-story... Matt wrote this story, and it was pretty good. Not one of his best, but better than some. Anyway, after reading it, I couldn't believe how horribly my character was portrayed. In Matt's version, Aaron is a smooth talking, witty, and generally swift player. He deals with Kirstin quite nicely, and doesn't trip at all.
In real life, that would never happen. Granted, in real life I wouldn't turn into a duck either, but that's beside the point. In the immortal words of King Arthur, "It's the principle of the thing." I had to rewrite it.
What you have (hopefully) just read was the final version of my edit. I took all my scenes and redid them. While I was at it, I redid most of the rest of the story, but I kept the basic underlying plot the same.
That's why the story is credited to Matt but authorship belongs to me. I would enjoy any feedback you'd like to send me. Send it to me at [email protected] and I'll reply ASAP.
Anyway, that's all for now. Hope you enjoyed!
Editor's Notes:
"Ironman," if I recall correctly, is a variation of the Magic: The Gathering card game in which cards are physically destroyed when they leave play. Hence, everyone's horror at the thought of playing it…
As many, many years have passed it is a very safe bet that the e-mail address Aaron supplied in his post-story notes is no longer valid. I suppose it is vaguely possible it will still work. After all, I have always had the same e-mail address ([email protected]), but I would not count on it. And sadly, since when I recently did manage to find contact info for Aaron and indeed, well, contacted Aaron... Well, this happened, and thus it didn't seem like an appropriate thing to ask if he wanted updated contact info for him up on this website.
Oh, please don't use the above e-mail address to spam me! But by all means, contact having to do with the content of this website is appreciated!
As many, many years have passed it is a very safe bet that the e-mail address Aaron supplied in his post-story notes is no longer valid. I suppose it is vaguely possible it will still work. After all, I have always had the same e-mail address ([email protected]), but I would not count on it. And sadly, since when I recently did manage to find contact info for Aaron and indeed, well, contacted Aaron... Well, this happened, and thus it didn't seem like an appropriate thing to ask if he wanted updated contact info for him up on this website.
Oh, please don't use the above e-mail address to spam me! But by all means, contact having to do with the content of this website is appreciated!
Additional Note from 2016:
The above story is still the official version of this tale. However, an exciting archaeological discovery has just been found and made available on this website for your viewing pleasure. So, here it is, the original draft of Boy Scouts ½, part 6. Enjoy!