Toro Watanabe sighed as his limo pulled to a halt in front of the building he lived in. It was a rather nice building, and the penthouse apartment he had was quite lovely, the best in the building. The second best, of course, belonged to Guy. Fortunately the penthouses were part of their contract, so those bastards Gates and Quincy hadn’t been able to take them away… yet…
Toro had just come back from his late night training session. He was in his peak physical condition. He was gonna take pure pleasure in wailing on Gates and Quincy. Now if only Guy would get his ass in a gym and actually lift weights instead of looking for change for the candy machine. He sighed to himself and looked at his home.
Still, lately the penthouse didn’t excite Toro as much as it once had. Nor did the hordes of attractive, young, nubile ADM groupies that were lined up
along the path between his limo door and the entrance to the building. In the past, he would likely have invited a few of them up to see his apartment, but lately he hadn’t been in the mood.
It was all the fault of Gates and Quincy, of course. Bastards. ADM had been the victim of a vicious corporate takeover. The stress and worry of what had once been a fun, dream job were beginning to have a serious affect on his life away from work as well. He just couldn’t have fun anymore. He could of course quit ADM, but that would be letting Gates and Quincy win, and there was no way in hell he’d let that happen.
He walked the gauntlet from the limo to the building entrance, hardly paying any notice to the hordes of screaming women willing to throw themselves at him. He sighed as the elevator door closed and the lift began it’s accent. He sighed as he swiped his keycard through the lock and opened the door. He sighed as he kicked off his shoes and flopped into a chair.
As he flopped, his hand brushed against something – a pile of papers. He picked the papers up and looked at them. On the top of the first sheet was a title: Boy Scouts ½, part 14: Perry Joins the Troop.
"Heh, Boy Scouts ½," Toro said aloud. It was one of his favorite fanfic series, as it was rather unique. No other fanfic series he knew of took the approach of introducing completely new characters and using the original characters only a little tiny bit, often not at all. True, many characters were
based on real life persons. It was the ultimate in gratuitous self-insertion fics. But still, it was good reading. In fact, Toro recalled once having a weird dream one night after reading too much Boy Scouts ½ before bed.
He was tired, and from his last experience he knew it was a bad idea to read fanfics before bed, but he was also eager to read this new story. A few paragraphs in, however, he was interrupted by a knock at the door.
"Who the hell could that be?" Toro asked, cursing. He walked over to the door and opened it, surprised as all hell to see Matthew Atanian standing on the other side.
"Hello," Matt said, stepping through the doorway. "Mind if I come in?"
"Um… no, not at all," Toro responded, confused.
"Sorry to bother you," Matt said, "but I felt it was time to do another Boy Scouts ½ Anime Deathmatch."
Toro scratched his head, confused. "What are you talking about?" he asked. "We’ve never done one."
"Ah, you’re confused. Of course. Allow me to explain. First off, I must mention that I am not the fictional character of Matthew Atanian as represented in Boy Scouts ½. But rather I am a fictionalized representation of the actual, real life Matt who is the author of Boy Scouts ½."
Toro nodded. He didn’t understand what Matt was talking about, but felt it would make his headache worse if he asked Matt to clarify.
"Anyway, Boy Scouts ½ and Anime Deathmatch are, of course, mutually exclusive. Therefore, something had to be done in order to make the first BS½ ADM fit into both universes. In the BS½ universe, the way that it fit was that it didn’t. The story was declared non-canonical and no characters have any memory of the story's events. In ADM, the story was presented as a dream that you had."
Toro was beginning to have something of a clue as to what was being said. "Are you implying I’m fictional?" he asked.
"No implication about it," Matt responded. "You are. Don’t worry, however. I’m sure that you’ll probably just remember all of this as a dream or something."
"Uh huh," Toro said, not convinced. "I don’t believe a word of this, you understand."
"Really?" Matt asked. "Fine, answer this."
Matt snapped his fingers, and Billy Gelinas appeared in a puff of smoke. "If the first BS½ ADM was all just a dream, how could there have been a clip from it in the First Anniversary Spectacular?" Billy left as he had come in, disappearing in a puff of smoke.
Toro looked at the puff and responded with the only answer he could: "SHUT UP, BILL!!!" He then slumped back into his chair.
"It’s true," Toro asked, "Isn’t it? All of it’s true. I’m not real."
"Hey," Matt responded, "you’re as real as you think you are. As I said, you’ll probably remember all of this as a dream, and who’s to say it isn’t? You ever see the movie Total Recall? Every time I see that, I’m more convinced the whole thing is a dream. Row, row, row you’re boat, eh?" Matt lowered his voice to a conspiratory whisper. "And hey, as this is all going to be a dream, anyways, we can do this ADM without Gates, Quincy, and their corporate lackeys."
Toro looked up at Matt. He smiled. "You’re right. We’ve got a show to do, damnit!"
Matt smiled. "Great! Let’s…" He was interrupted by a knock on the door.
Toro went to answer it and returned a moment later. He handed an envelope to Matt. "It’s for you," he said, perplexed.
Matt, similarly perplexed, took the envelope and tore it open. As he read the paper he had extracted from within, his expression changed from confusion to wonder to utter horror.
"What is it?" Toro asked.
"It’s a challenge for a match," Matt said. "A challenge… to me?"
Toro had just come back from his late night training session. He was in his peak physical condition. He was gonna take pure pleasure in wailing on Gates and Quincy. Now if only Guy would get his ass in a gym and actually lift weights instead of looking for change for the candy machine. He sighed to himself and looked at his home.
Still, lately the penthouse didn’t excite Toro as much as it once had. Nor did the hordes of attractive, young, nubile ADM groupies that were lined up
along the path between his limo door and the entrance to the building. In the past, he would likely have invited a few of them up to see his apartment, but lately he hadn’t been in the mood.
It was all the fault of Gates and Quincy, of course. Bastards. ADM had been the victim of a vicious corporate takeover. The stress and worry of what had once been a fun, dream job were beginning to have a serious affect on his life away from work as well. He just couldn’t have fun anymore. He could of course quit ADM, but that would be letting Gates and Quincy win, and there was no way in hell he’d let that happen.
He walked the gauntlet from the limo to the building entrance, hardly paying any notice to the hordes of screaming women willing to throw themselves at him. He sighed as the elevator door closed and the lift began it’s accent. He sighed as he swiped his keycard through the lock and opened the door. He sighed as he kicked off his shoes and flopped into a chair.
As he flopped, his hand brushed against something – a pile of papers. He picked the papers up and looked at them. On the top of the first sheet was a title: Boy Scouts ½, part 14: Perry Joins the Troop.
"Heh, Boy Scouts ½," Toro said aloud. It was one of his favorite fanfic series, as it was rather unique. No other fanfic series he knew of took the approach of introducing completely new characters and using the original characters only a little tiny bit, often not at all. True, many characters were
based on real life persons. It was the ultimate in gratuitous self-insertion fics. But still, it was good reading. In fact, Toro recalled once having a weird dream one night after reading too much Boy Scouts ½ before bed.
He was tired, and from his last experience he knew it was a bad idea to read fanfics before bed, but he was also eager to read this new story. A few paragraphs in, however, he was interrupted by a knock at the door.
"Who the hell could that be?" Toro asked, cursing. He walked over to the door and opened it, surprised as all hell to see Matthew Atanian standing on the other side.
"Hello," Matt said, stepping through the doorway. "Mind if I come in?"
"Um… no, not at all," Toro responded, confused.
"Sorry to bother you," Matt said, "but I felt it was time to do another Boy Scouts ½ Anime Deathmatch."
Toro scratched his head, confused. "What are you talking about?" he asked. "We’ve never done one."
"Ah, you’re confused. Of course. Allow me to explain. First off, I must mention that I am not the fictional character of Matthew Atanian as represented in Boy Scouts ½. But rather I am a fictionalized representation of the actual, real life Matt who is the author of Boy Scouts ½."
Toro nodded. He didn’t understand what Matt was talking about, but felt it would make his headache worse if he asked Matt to clarify.
"Anyway, Boy Scouts ½ and Anime Deathmatch are, of course, mutually exclusive. Therefore, something had to be done in order to make the first BS½ ADM fit into both universes. In the BS½ universe, the way that it fit was that it didn’t. The story was declared non-canonical and no characters have any memory of the story's events. In ADM, the story was presented as a dream that you had."
Toro was beginning to have something of a clue as to what was being said. "Are you implying I’m fictional?" he asked.
"No implication about it," Matt responded. "You are. Don’t worry, however. I’m sure that you’ll probably just remember all of this as a dream or something."
"Uh huh," Toro said, not convinced. "I don’t believe a word of this, you understand."
"Really?" Matt asked. "Fine, answer this."
Matt snapped his fingers, and Billy Gelinas appeared in a puff of smoke. "If the first BS½ ADM was all just a dream, how could there have been a clip from it in the First Anniversary Spectacular?" Billy left as he had come in, disappearing in a puff of smoke.
Toro looked at the puff and responded with the only answer he could: "SHUT UP, BILL!!!" He then slumped back into his chair.
"It’s true," Toro asked, "Isn’t it? All of it’s true. I’m not real."
"Hey," Matt responded, "you’re as real as you think you are. As I said, you’ll probably remember all of this as a dream, and who’s to say it isn’t? You ever see the movie Total Recall? Every time I see that, I’m more convinced the whole thing is a dream. Row, row, row you’re boat, eh?" Matt lowered his voice to a conspiratory whisper. "And hey, as this is all going to be a dream, anyways, we can do this ADM without Gates, Quincy, and their corporate lackeys."
Toro looked up at Matt. He smiled. "You’re right. We’ve got a show to do, damnit!"
Matt smiled. "Great! Let’s…" He was interrupted by a knock on the door.
Toro went to answer it and returned a moment later. He handed an envelope to Matt. "It’s for you," he said, perplexed.
Matt, similarly perplexed, took the envelope and tore it open. As he read the paper he had extracted from within, his expression changed from confusion to wonder to utter horror.
"What is it?" Toro asked.
"It’s a challenge for a match," Matt said. "A challenge… to me?"
+The darkened arena becomes ablaze with the usual pyrotechnic display, The crowd cheering holding homemade signs, etc…+
Guy: Hi there folks, I’m Guy Makihashi!
Toro: And I’m Toro Watanabe, and this is ANIME DEATHMATCH!!!
Guy: And this certainly is an exciting night here tonight! For tonight, we are finely free for one evening of the shackles of Gates and Quincy!!!
Toro: That’s right, Guy! Not only that, but we have quite a few exciting matches lined up for you, in this, our second Boy Scouts ½ related event!
Guy: I’ll never forget the first one… Oh, sweet Washu-chan…
Toro: Anyway, here are the matches we have lined up for you this evening. First off, in a match whose origins can be traced back to the first BS½ ADM, it’s Proctor vs. Ifurita in the battle of the flunkies!
Guy: Next we have a pair of Amazon cousins going head to head in Perfume vs. Shampoo!
Toro: Then a surprise challenge to the Hentai Belt in Derek Provost vs. Tenchi Masaki!
Guy: And lastly, our main event! Matthew Atanian, the creator of Boy Scouts ½, will face off against a mystery opponent!
Toro: This last match should be full of surprises. No one knows who Matt’s mystery challenger is, not even our own Trevor Bravo, who is at this very moment interviewing the mystery challenger…
+Cut to Trevor in locker room with mysterious cloaked figure+
Trevor: Why have you challenged Mr. Atanian to a fight to the death?
Cloaked Figure: … … …
Trevor: Um… Okay… Is there anything at all you wanted to say concerning today’s match?
Cloaked Figure: … … …
Trevor: I see… Um… Is it true that you and Senator Palpitine are one and the same?
Cloaked Figure: I am NOT Darth Sidious!
+Cloaked Figure raises hand and makes a pinching gesture. Trevor begins to choke. Cut back to Guy and Toro.+
Toro: Well, I’d hate to be in Matt Atanian’s shoes right now!
Guy: We’ll check back in with Trevor later. Now for our first match.
Toro: This match goes back to the first BS½ ADM, when two of a kind faced off
in the ring and left together, seemingly new comrades. Let’s take a look at some of that patented old footage…
+Cut to footage from the first BS½ ADM+
Jinnai: I am the ruler of Shinonome High School.
Justy: I am the ruler of Boy Scout Troop 192.
Jinnai: I am the ruler of the Bugrom army!
Justy: An army?
Jinnai: Beat that, if you can. Ha ha hahaha HA HA HAHAHahahahAHAHA!!!!!
Justy: You need a second in command? That must be tough work. Can I get you some coffee?
Jinnai: What? Coffee?
Toro: What the hell just happened?
Mike: You're forgetting. Justy will squash those under him, but those above him he'll kiss up to like there's no tomorrow.
+crowd boos... shouts of "We want blood! Where's the fighting!? Come on!!!"+
Jinnai: Well, actually, I prefer tea...
Justy: Coming right up! This way, please...
+they walk out of the amphitheater+
Mike: I think, unfortunately, Justy won.
Toro: What do you mean?
Mike: Justy will wait until the time is right and take over from Jinnai. I feel bad for all of El-Hazard... but, hey! At least he'll be out of our hair now! All right!
+Cut back to Guy and Toro+
Toro: They left as comrades, but something has since gone horribly wrong. And now these two are back, and settling things the way they always do… by letting others fight for them!
Name: Proctor
Status: Assistant Senior Patrol Leader
Claim to Fame: Well meaning but klutzy, always foiling his beloved leader’s fiendish plans.
Name: Ifurita
Status: Ancient Demon God
Claim to Fame: Well meaning but ditzy, always foiling her leader’s fiendish plans.
+Cut to ring+
Vince (on PA): Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, This is ANIME DEATHMATCH!!! Coming into the ring led by Katsuhiko Jinnai, from
the El-Hazard TV Series, Ifurita!!!
Ifurita: Hi all you people! I’m really sorry I blew up you’re arena last time! I’m going to be really Evil this time and just blow up my opponent! That’ll make my master happy!
Jinnai: That’s right, Ifurita! You get that sniveling little worm, Justy!
Vince: And coming into the ring led by Justy Yung, from Boy Scout Troop 192, Proctor!
Proctor: Are you sure about this Captain? Isn’t she like some powerful ancient weapon or something?
Justy: Don’t you worry about that, now, Proctor! Just get that sniveling little worm, Jinnai!
Justy & Jinnai: Bwa ha ha ha ha ha hahahAHAHAHAHAHahahaha ha ha ha ha!!!
Jinnai: Stop that, you imbecile! That’s my laugh!
Justy: No, you stop it, you peon! That’s my laugh!
Mills Lane: Why don’t you both stop it and get the hell out my ring?
+Justy and Jinnai leave the ring and stand at opposite corners+
Mills: Okay, you two lackeys, I want a good, clean fight. Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!
+Bell rings.+
Guy: Proctor and Ifurita seem to be sizing each other up…
Toro: No, I think they’re just looking at each other, dumbfounded.
Proctor: Captain? Do I have to this? It seems kind of… dangerous?
Ifurita: Master, do I have to do this? It doesn’t seem nice to beat up on this guy, and I have to be nice so I can be the best at being evil!
Proctor: Captain?
Ifurita: Master?
Toro: While our attention was drawn by the match, it seems like Jinnai and Justy have vanished!
Guy: I’m getting word from ringside that there seems to have been a struggle. We’ll have more for you when we find out what has happened.
Toro: Meanwhile, Proctor and Ifurita seem to be going off for some tea.
Guy: This seems eerily familiar… except without the back stabbing…
Toro: Well, that was unexciting, wasn’t it? Anywho, let’s check back in with Trevor and see if he has any more for us.
+Cut to Trevor in locker room with Matt Atanian. Trevor is gingerly rubbing his neck.+
Trevor: Well then, any idea what just happened with Justy and Jinnai?
Matt: Of course I know. I’m the one writing this story. In fact, I control everything here. For example…
Trevor: My, that is a lovely fruit bat mangrove nostril.
Matt: See?
Trevor: Why did I just say that?
Matt: I made you say that. As I said, I control everything here.
+Matt snaps his fingers. Trevor becomes a walrus. Matt snaps his fingers again, returning Trevor to normal.+
Trevor: Ahem… Well, then. So what happened to Justy and Jinnai?
Matt: What, and spoil the surprise? You’ll find out in good time, don’t you worry.
Trevor: I see. Now, the big question is this: Who is your mystery challenger?
Matt: *frowns* Haven’t a clue.
Trevor: But don’t you control everything here?
Matt: Yes, and that’s what worries me. There seems to be a higher force at work here.
Trevor: I see. Well, thank you for the interview.
+Cut back to Guy and Toro.+
Guy: Did Trevor just make it through an entire interview without suffering major bodily harm, while actually getting some interesting information?
Toro: This must be a dream. Only explanation. Anyway, on to the next match:
Name: Perfume
Home Village: Joketsuzoku
Curse: Spring of Drowned Guy
Interest in Main Character(s): Wants to kill ‘em
Name: Shampoo
Home Village: Joketsuzoku
Curse: Spring of Drowned Cat
Interest in Main Character: Wants to marry him
+Cut to ring.+
Vince (On PA): Entering the ring, hailing from Perfume’s Pizza, one chick with real gender issues, Perfume! And now entering the ring, hailing from the Cat Café, this combatant really is the cat’s meow, Shampoo!
Mills: All right, you two, I want a clean fight, two cheeseburgers, a large fry, and a large Sprite! And don’t fill the damn cup all the way to the top with ice and put in only a drop of soda! Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!!
+Bell rings+
Perfume: Now, cousin, I show great-grandmother that I am true Amazon warrior!
Shampoo: Don’t make Shampoo laugh! You nothing but joke!
+Perfume charges at Shampoo, trips on a shoelace, flies into the ropes, and snaps her neck.+
Guy: Ouch!
Toro: That’s gotta hurt!
Cologne: (from audience) That child is such a disappointment…
Guy: Even though we finely got some violence in here… at last… I can’t help but feel… cheated. What fun is it when one of the combatants kills themselves… accidentally… first thing in the match?
Toro: I know what you mean, Guy, I know what you mean… Well, let’s check back in with Trevor:
+Cut to Trevor in hall way, standing with Makoto Mizuhara and Mike Quadrozzi+
Trevor: Well, we’ve had a breakthrough in what happened during the Proctor / Ifurita match. With me here is Makoto Mizuhara and Mike Quadrozzi.
Makoto: Hi.
Mike: Hi.
Trevor: Could you explain what has happened here tonight?
Makoto: Well, Mike and I heard about this match up, and thought it would be the perfect opportunity to kill two birds with one stone, as it were.
Mike: That’s right. While all of you were distracted by the match…
Makoto: Especially Jinnai and Justy…
Mike: We snuck up on them and captured them both.
Makoto: We then diced them up into tiny little pieces, freeze dried them, put all of the little pieces into handy dandy zip-lock bags, and turned the bags
over to the Galaxy Police. The bags will be taken to GP HQ, where they will be put into subspace storage, safe from escape for all eternity.
Mike: The officer we gave the bags to was most helpful. Mihoshi, I think her name was…
Trevor: I have a bad feeling about this… Back to you, Guy and Toro!
+Cut back to Guy and Toro+
Toro: Well, now we have a match that is sure to be exciting…
Guy: And not just because of the violence content!
Toro: That’s right! After all, when the Hentai Belt is on the line, there’s sure to be some scantly clad women involved!
Guy: And scantly clad women are certainly a big draw for a Boy Scout from Troop 180, and he is here tonight to challenge Tenchi Masaki for the Hentai Belt!
Toro: And to think that not long ago, Tenchi was considered by many to be anime’s biggest eunuch. He set that record straight, but now Derek is looking to set a new record straight!
Guy: Um, Toro, you ever wonder why we talk the way we do? Does it ever seem like it just doesn’t make sense?
Toro: SHUT UP GUY!!! It’s just "announcer speak." You should know, you’re an announcer, too…
Name: Tenchi Masaki
Claim to Fame: Former “eunuch,” now the biggest pimp daddy in anime history.
Likes: Big shiny belts.
Name: Derek Provost
Claim to Fame: The Leprechaun. The Walking Hormone.
Likes: Things that jiggle other then Jell-O, unless the Jell-O is in a big vat with two scantly clad women in it in the middle of a cat fight… me-ow!!!
Vince: (on PA) Entering the ring… first preceded by his posse giving him a grand ol' entrance…
+Isaac Hayes walks out onto the entrance ramp. Behind Hayes, Ayeka and Ryoko step out in sequin gowns. Isaac motions for a cue, and the theme from "Shaft" Begins to play…+
Hayes: Who is the Prince all the girls wanna see?
Ryoko and Ayeka: Tenchi!
Hayes: You daaaaaaaammnnnnn right.
+Tenchi Masaki walks out onto the ramp, wearing a neon green vest, gold chains, a giant pink pompadour hat with a yellow feather, sequin studded sunglasses and a pair of gold fist rings. The Hentai Belt is draped over one shoulder.+
Vince: Tenchi Masaki!!!
+Crowd cheers+
Hayes: Who is the guy, that all chicks think is superfly? Ayeka and Ryoko: Tenchi! Hayes: Can you dig it?
+Tenchi puts a cigar in his mouth that Ayeka lights. Ryoko takes his belt and drapes it over the ropes near their corner.+
Vince: And now entering the ring, with no fanfare at all, accompanied by no one at all, from Boy Scout Troop 180, Derek Provost!!!
+Derek enters the ring. Tenchi puffs on his cigar. Derek spots Ryoko and Ayeka. Moments later, Derek is standing in a puddle of drool.+
Toro: You know, I have a funny feeling I know what strategy Tenchi is going to use in this match.
Guy: I suspect you’re probably right, and if you are then I will be the next challenger for the Hentai Belt.
+Tenchi continues to smoke as Mills Lane checks over the two…+
Mills: Okay, you two…
Derek: I'M THE LEPRECHAUN, DON'T TRY TO KILL ME @$%!!!
Tenchi: Hold on a moment, I have a “proposition” for Mr. Provost here…
Guy: Sign me up as the next challenger!!!
Tenchi: Now you could try to win that belt, KNOWING full well that I’m gonna kick your ass. But tonight, I’m gonna make you the deal of a lifetime. In exchange for forfeiting the match, not only do you get to live, you can also have the lovely Miss Ryoko for the whole damn night.
Derek: The whole night?
+Tenchi nods+
Derek: Ryoko’s the jiggly one there, right?
Ryoko: *whispering to herself* It’s only for one night…it’s for Tenchi…it’s only for one night… He promised that this is the last time…
+Tenchi nods+
Derek: But… if I beat you and become the Hentai Champion, don’t I get both the girls, all the time?
Ayeka: We will never abandon Lord Tenchi!
Tenchi: You think you stand a chance, little man?
Derek: I'M THE LEPRECHAUN, DON'T TRY TO KILL ME @$%!!!
Tenchi: Still, I can be reasonable… What if I throw in the lovely Miss Ayeka as well?
+Ayeka gasps. Ryoko snickers at her.+
Derek: Both girls? All night?
Tenchi: All night, all yours…
+Derek ponders this for less then a nanosecond before dragging Ayeka and Ryoko out of the ring with him.+
Hayes: Who’s the man who’s the Hentai king?
+Silence… Tenchi looks confused for a moment before realizing that since both Ayeka and Ryoko are gone, there’s no one to sing the next part of the song. Tenchi grabs his belt and sheepishly leaves the ring with Hayes.+
Toro: Well, then… Um…
Guy: Think we’ll ever get a real match tonight?
Toro: Well, the next one certainly has some promise. The main event!
Name: Matthew Atanian
Fanfic Creations: Boy Scouts ½
Most Recent Embarrassment: Realizing that he spent enough at Otakon 1999 to solve all national budget problems.
Name: ????
Fanfic Creations: ????
Most Recent Embarrassment: ????
Toro: Ah, the excitement of a mystery challenger!
Guy: We should find out soon what his or her identity is!
+Cut to ring.+
Vince: (on PA) Entering the ring, wearing the black trench-coat and fedora, none other then the very guy who is typing this as I say it, MATTHEW ATANIAN!!! And coming into the ring from the other corner, a mysterious guy who gets his disguises from Cloaks ‘r’ Us, um… GUY WHOSE NAME I DON’T KNOW!!!
Cloaked Figure: Are you ready to die, Matthew?
Matt: That voice… It couldn’t be…
+The mysterious man throws off his cloak to reveal…+
Toro and Guy: Jason Betrovich!!!!
+Jason is dressed like Roy Bromwell from Rival Schools, wearing tennis shoes, light-blue denim jeans, a white dress shirt with the sleeves partially rolled, black fingerless fighting gloves, a red dress vest, and a dark red tie. +
Matt: Jason!? But why?
Jason: I’ll tell you why… You never return my e-mails any more! You’re too busy with that damned Final Fantasy VIII! “Oh, I’m sorry, Jason, I can’t talk to you now. I’m too busy fantasizing about Rinoa.”
Matt: Actually, not that this helps, but I’m partial to Quistis…
Jason: Not only that, but your website wouldn’t be half as popular as it is if I hadn’t helped you with some promotion… and yet you’ve got over 10,000 hits and I’m not even at 6,000 yet! This is the thanks I get for listing your site on AnimeLinks.com!
Matt: And who do you think listed your site on the Anime Pitstop? And where did you get the idea to join the Anime Fan Fiction Webring? And where did you get the idea to do a first anniversary contest for your website? Hmmm? Some people are so ungrateful…
Jason: Oh yeah? Oh, yeah?!? Well what ever happened to those Ranma tapes I asked you to make for me? One little favor, and I'm still waiting for those tapes!
Matt: Well, okay, I'm starting to see your point...
Jason: And one last thing! Why the fuck can you never even spell my last name right? Have I ever screwed up Atanian? No! I don’t think so! For the last time, asshole, it’s Bertovich, not Betrovich!!!
Guy: Whoops! Hope he didn’t notice!
Toro: Can’t blame us… It was Matt who typed our words.
Guy: Good thinking, Toro. Anyway, with all of this arguing, I think we’re in for a good match at last.
Toro: I hope you’re right.
Mills: All right, you two. I want a good clean fight, I want a nice house in the suburbs, I want a wife, three point four kids, and a dog named Suzy. Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!!
+Bell rings.+
Matt: Now, Jason, I hope you weren’t planning on any fancy Rival Schools techniques. As you know, I’ve barely ever played that game and wouldn’t know how to describe anything as I write this.
Jason: Damn you, Matt. Fine, I guess I’ll just have to resort to stupid, simple, easy to describe moves!
+Jason delivers a swift uppercut to Matt, and then follows that up with a couple of blows to the stomach.+
Jason: How’s that?
Matt: *between coughs and hacks* That… was good… thanks… easy to… type…
+Matt catches his breath+
Matt: But you’re forgetting one crucial thing, Jason-kun…Jason: Oh? What’s that?
Matt: I’m writing this story… I am GOD here! And now a scene from, “Pete, part two.”
+Jason begins flying around, and the sounds of fists impacting with him can be heard. It seems very much like an invisible force is pummeling him.+
Jason: *between coughs and hacks* My complements… that was… good, yourself… but… you’re forgetting something…
Matt: Oh? What’s that?
Jason: You may be writing this story, but you set it in my Universe. Therefore, I am God here, not you! I've let you have your fun long enough. No more games!
Matt: Oh… Oh, shit…
+Jason delivers a swift leaping uppercut to Matt...+
Jason: TWISTER UPPER!!!
+Jason then leaps and slams his fist into the ground, a moment later the ground under Matt explodes...+
Jason: TOUCHDOWN WAVE!!!
+Matt flies into the corner...+
Jason: How’s that? See, you didn't have to lift a finger to get your ass kicked... heh *smirk*
Matt: I commend you... *wipes blood from mouth* But... dammit! QUIT SMIRKING!
Jason: Don't like my smirking, eh? Just for that... heh...
+Jason snaps his fingers and four exact copies of the English Dub Minmei appear around Matt. They begin singing.+
Minmeis: Stage lights, splashing, the feeling’s smashing…
+Matt desperately clutches his ears and screams in inhuman terror.+
Guy: My, God!
Toro: Oh, the humanity!
Audience Member: Hey! Jason! Matt! I challenge whoever wins to a Jell-O wrestling match!
Guy: Was that?
Toro: Yes, it was!
Guy: The Bouncy Goddess herself!
Toro: Fenny Lin!!!
Matt: Jell-O wrestling… with Fenny…
Jason: Oh… Oh, shit…
+Matt suddenly swings his arm in a wide arc, smashing the head of each Minmei as if they were watermelons and his arm was a Sledge-o-matic™.+
Jason: Matt… Friend… I may have been a bit hasty there… Matt?
+Matt grabs Jason by the tie and lifts him off the ground. He swings him in a wide arc, until he’s built up enough force for Jason to reach escape velocity.+
Matt: Jason?
Jason: Yes, Matt?
Matt: Quick trivia question for you... What was the ending theme song for Neon Genesis Evangelion?
Jason: "Fly me to the Moon?"
Matt: Gladly!
Jason: Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
+Matt lets Jason go. Jason goes flying, smashing through the roof. He keeps flying away, disappearing into infinity, still swearing.+
Jason: Screw you Ataniaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn...
Guy: Oh, dear… Who is going to write the next Deathmatch?
Toro: Don’t worry… I think this is all just a dream… I hope… Isn’t it?
+Fenny, wearing a Sailor Fuku, runs onto the ring and throws her arms around Matt. The two walk off into the sunset, hand in hand.+
Guy: *watching Matt and Fenny walk off* Yes, but whose dream?
Toro: Well, that’s all for this evening.
Guy: I’m Guy Makihashi.
Toro: And I’m Toro Watanabe, for all of us at Anime Deathmatch, "We Didn’t Invent Violence, We Just Perfected It." Goodnight!
*End Transmission*
Guy: Hi there folks, I’m Guy Makihashi!
Toro: And I’m Toro Watanabe, and this is ANIME DEATHMATCH!!!
Guy: And this certainly is an exciting night here tonight! For tonight, we are finely free for one evening of the shackles of Gates and Quincy!!!
Toro: That’s right, Guy! Not only that, but we have quite a few exciting matches lined up for you, in this, our second Boy Scouts ½ related event!
Guy: I’ll never forget the first one… Oh, sweet Washu-chan…
Toro: Anyway, here are the matches we have lined up for you this evening. First off, in a match whose origins can be traced back to the first BS½ ADM, it’s Proctor vs. Ifurita in the battle of the flunkies!
Guy: Next we have a pair of Amazon cousins going head to head in Perfume vs. Shampoo!
Toro: Then a surprise challenge to the Hentai Belt in Derek Provost vs. Tenchi Masaki!
Guy: And lastly, our main event! Matthew Atanian, the creator of Boy Scouts ½, will face off against a mystery opponent!
Toro: This last match should be full of surprises. No one knows who Matt’s mystery challenger is, not even our own Trevor Bravo, who is at this very moment interviewing the mystery challenger…
+Cut to Trevor in locker room with mysterious cloaked figure+
Trevor: Why have you challenged Mr. Atanian to a fight to the death?
Cloaked Figure: … … …
Trevor: Um… Okay… Is there anything at all you wanted to say concerning today’s match?
Cloaked Figure: … … …
Trevor: I see… Um… Is it true that you and Senator Palpitine are one and the same?
Cloaked Figure: I am NOT Darth Sidious!
+Cloaked Figure raises hand and makes a pinching gesture. Trevor begins to choke. Cut back to Guy and Toro.+
Toro: Well, I’d hate to be in Matt Atanian’s shoes right now!
Guy: We’ll check back in with Trevor later. Now for our first match.
Toro: This match goes back to the first BS½ ADM, when two of a kind faced off
in the ring and left together, seemingly new comrades. Let’s take a look at some of that patented old footage…
+Cut to footage from the first BS½ ADM+
Jinnai: I am the ruler of Shinonome High School.
Justy: I am the ruler of Boy Scout Troop 192.
Jinnai: I am the ruler of the Bugrom army!
Justy: An army?
Jinnai: Beat that, if you can. Ha ha hahaha HA HA HAHAHahahahAHAHA!!!!!
Justy: You need a second in command? That must be tough work. Can I get you some coffee?
Jinnai: What? Coffee?
Toro: What the hell just happened?
Mike: You're forgetting. Justy will squash those under him, but those above him he'll kiss up to like there's no tomorrow.
+crowd boos... shouts of "We want blood! Where's the fighting!? Come on!!!"+
Jinnai: Well, actually, I prefer tea...
Justy: Coming right up! This way, please...
+they walk out of the amphitheater+
Mike: I think, unfortunately, Justy won.
Toro: What do you mean?
Mike: Justy will wait until the time is right and take over from Jinnai. I feel bad for all of El-Hazard... but, hey! At least he'll be out of our hair now! All right!
+Cut back to Guy and Toro+
Toro: They left as comrades, but something has since gone horribly wrong. And now these two are back, and settling things the way they always do… by letting others fight for them!
Name: Proctor
Status: Assistant Senior Patrol Leader
Claim to Fame: Well meaning but klutzy, always foiling his beloved leader’s fiendish plans.
Name: Ifurita
Status: Ancient Demon God
Claim to Fame: Well meaning but ditzy, always foiling her leader’s fiendish plans.
+Cut to ring+
Vince (on PA): Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, This is ANIME DEATHMATCH!!! Coming into the ring led by Katsuhiko Jinnai, from
the El-Hazard TV Series, Ifurita!!!
Ifurita: Hi all you people! I’m really sorry I blew up you’re arena last time! I’m going to be really Evil this time and just blow up my opponent! That’ll make my master happy!
Jinnai: That’s right, Ifurita! You get that sniveling little worm, Justy!
Vince: And coming into the ring led by Justy Yung, from Boy Scout Troop 192, Proctor!
Proctor: Are you sure about this Captain? Isn’t she like some powerful ancient weapon or something?
Justy: Don’t you worry about that, now, Proctor! Just get that sniveling little worm, Jinnai!
Justy & Jinnai: Bwa ha ha ha ha ha hahahAHAHAHAHAHahahaha ha ha ha ha!!!
Jinnai: Stop that, you imbecile! That’s my laugh!
Justy: No, you stop it, you peon! That’s my laugh!
Mills Lane: Why don’t you both stop it and get the hell out my ring?
+Justy and Jinnai leave the ring and stand at opposite corners+
Mills: Okay, you two lackeys, I want a good, clean fight. Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!
+Bell rings.+
Guy: Proctor and Ifurita seem to be sizing each other up…
Toro: No, I think they’re just looking at each other, dumbfounded.
Proctor: Captain? Do I have to this? It seems kind of… dangerous?
Ifurita: Master, do I have to do this? It doesn’t seem nice to beat up on this guy, and I have to be nice so I can be the best at being evil!
Proctor: Captain?
Ifurita: Master?
Toro: While our attention was drawn by the match, it seems like Jinnai and Justy have vanished!
Guy: I’m getting word from ringside that there seems to have been a struggle. We’ll have more for you when we find out what has happened.
Toro: Meanwhile, Proctor and Ifurita seem to be going off for some tea.
Guy: This seems eerily familiar… except without the back stabbing…
Toro: Well, that was unexciting, wasn’t it? Anywho, let’s check back in with Trevor and see if he has any more for us.
+Cut to Trevor in locker room with Matt Atanian. Trevor is gingerly rubbing his neck.+
Trevor: Well then, any idea what just happened with Justy and Jinnai?
Matt: Of course I know. I’m the one writing this story. In fact, I control everything here. For example…
Trevor: My, that is a lovely fruit bat mangrove nostril.
Matt: See?
Trevor: Why did I just say that?
Matt: I made you say that. As I said, I control everything here.
+Matt snaps his fingers. Trevor becomes a walrus. Matt snaps his fingers again, returning Trevor to normal.+
Trevor: Ahem… Well, then. So what happened to Justy and Jinnai?
Matt: What, and spoil the surprise? You’ll find out in good time, don’t you worry.
Trevor: I see. Now, the big question is this: Who is your mystery challenger?
Matt: *frowns* Haven’t a clue.
Trevor: But don’t you control everything here?
Matt: Yes, and that’s what worries me. There seems to be a higher force at work here.
Trevor: I see. Well, thank you for the interview.
+Cut back to Guy and Toro.+
Guy: Did Trevor just make it through an entire interview without suffering major bodily harm, while actually getting some interesting information?
Toro: This must be a dream. Only explanation. Anyway, on to the next match:
Name: Perfume
Home Village: Joketsuzoku
Curse: Spring of Drowned Guy
Interest in Main Character(s): Wants to kill ‘em
Name: Shampoo
Home Village: Joketsuzoku
Curse: Spring of Drowned Cat
Interest in Main Character: Wants to marry him
+Cut to ring.+
Vince (On PA): Entering the ring, hailing from Perfume’s Pizza, one chick with real gender issues, Perfume! And now entering the ring, hailing from the Cat Café, this combatant really is the cat’s meow, Shampoo!
Mills: All right, you two, I want a clean fight, two cheeseburgers, a large fry, and a large Sprite! And don’t fill the damn cup all the way to the top with ice and put in only a drop of soda! Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!!
+Bell rings+
Perfume: Now, cousin, I show great-grandmother that I am true Amazon warrior!
Shampoo: Don’t make Shampoo laugh! You nothing but joke!
+Perfume charges at Shampoo, trips on a shoelace, flies into the ropes, and snaps her neck.+
Guy: Ouch!
Toro: That’s gotta hurt!
Cologne: (from audience) That child is such a disappointment…
Guy: Even though we finely got some violence in here… at last… I can’t help but feel… cheated. What fun is it when one of the combatants kills themselves… accidentally… first thing in the match?
Toro: I know what you mean, Guy, I know what you mean… Well, let’s check back in with Trevor:
+Cut to Trevor in hall way, standing with Makoto Mizuhara and Mike Quadrozzi+
Trevor: Well, we’ve had a breakthrough in what happened during the Proctor / Ifurita match. With me here is Makoto Mizuhara and Mike Quadrozzi.
Makoto: Hi.
Mike: Hi.
Trevor: Could you explain what has happened here tonight?
Makoto: Well, Mike and I heard about this match up, and thought it would be the perfect opportunity to kill two birds with one stone, as it were.
Mike: That’s right. While all of you were distracted by the match…
Makoto: Especially Jinnai and Justy…
Mike: We snuck up on them and captured them both.
Makoto: We then diced them up into tiny little pieces, freeze dried them, put all of the little pieces into handy dandy zip-lock bags, and turned the bags
over to the Galaxy Police. The bags will be taken to GP HQ, where they will be put into subspace storage, safe from escape for all eternity.
Mike: The officer we gave the bags to was most helpful. Mihoshi, I think her name was…
Trevor: I have a bad feeling about this… Back to you, Guy and Toro!
+Cut back to Guy and Toro+
Toro: Well, now we have a match that is sure to be exciting…
Guy: And not just because of the violence content!
Toro: That’s right! After all, when the Hentai Belt is on the line, there’s sure to be some scantly clad women involved!
Guy: And scantly clad women are certainly a big draw for a Boy Scout from Troop 180, and he is here tonight to challenge Tenchi Masaki for the Hentai Belt!
Toro: And to think that not long ago, Tenchi was considered by many to be anime’s biggest eunuch. He set that record straight, but now Derek is looking to set a new record straight!
Guy: Um, Toro, you ever wonder why we talk the way we do? Does it ever seem like it just doesn’t make sense?
Toro: SHUT UP GUY!!! It’s just "announcer speak." You should know, you’re an announcer, too…
Name: Tenchi Masaki
Claim to Fame: Former “eunuch,” now the biggest pimp daddy in anime history.
Likes: Big shiny belts.
Name: Derek Provost
Claim to Fame: The Leprechaun. The Walking Hormone.
Likes: Things that jiggle other then Jell-O, unless the Jell-O is in a big vat with two scantly clad women in it in the middle of a cat fight… me-ow!!!
Vince: (on PA) Entering the ring… first preceded by his posse giving him a grand ol' entrance…
+Isaac Hayes walks out onto the entrance ramp. Behind Hayes, Ayeka and Ryoko step out in sequin gowns. Isaac motions for a cue, and the theme from "Shaft" Begins to play…+
Hayes: Who is the Prince all the girls wanna see?
Ryoko and Ayeka: Tenchi!
Hayes: You daaaaaaaammnnnnn right.
+Tenchi Masaki walks out onto the ramp, wearing a neon green vest, gold chains, a giant pink pompadour hat with a yellow feather, sequin studded sunglasses and a pair of gold fist rings. The Hentai Belt is draped over one shoulder.+
Vince: Tenchi Masaki!!!
+Crowd cheers+
Hayes: Who is the guy, that all chicks think is superfly? Ayeka and Ryoko: Tenchi! Hayes: Can you dig it?
+Tenchi puts a cigar in his mouth that Ayeka lights. Ryoko takes his belt and drapes it over the ropes near their corner.+
Vince: And now entering the ring, with no fanfare at all, accompanied by no one at all, from Boy Scout Troop 180, Derek Provost!!!
+Derek enters the ring. Tenchi puffs on his cigar. Derek spots Ryoko and Ayeka. Moments later, Derek is standing in a puddle of drool.+
Toro: You know, I have a funny feeling I know what strategy Tenchi is going to use in this match.
Guy: I suspect you’re probably right, and if you are then I will be the next challenger for the Hentai Belt.
+Tenchi continues to smoke as Mills Lane checks over the two…+
Mills: Okay, you two…
Derek: I'M THE LEPRECHAUN, DON'T TRY TO KILL ME @$%!!!
Tenchi: Hold on a moment, I have a “proposition” for Mr. Provost here…
Guy: Sign me up as the next challenger!!!
Tenchi: Now you could try to win that belt, KNOWING full well that I’m gonna kick your ass. But tonight, I’m gonna make you the deal of a lifetime. In exchange for forfeiting the match, not only do you get to live, you can also have the lovely Miss Ryoko for the whole damn night.
Derek: The whole night?
+Tenchi nods+
Derek: Ryoko’s the jiggly one there, right?
Ryoko: *whispering to herself* It’s only for one night…it’s for Tenchi…it’s only for one night… He promised that this is the last time…
+Tenchi nods+
Derek: But… if I beat you and become the Hentai Champion, don’t I get both the girls, all the time?
Ayeka: We will never abandon Lord Tenchi!
Tenchi: You think you stand a chance, little man?
Derek: I'M THE LEPRECHAUN, DON'T TRY TO KILL ME @$%!!!
Tenchi: Still, I can be reasonable… What if I throw in the lovely Miss Ayeka as well?
+Ayeka gasps. Ryoko snickers at her.+
Derek: Both girls? All night?
Tenchi: All night, all yours…
+Derek ponders this for less then a nanosecond before dragging Ayeka and Ryoko out of the ring with him.+
Hayes: Who’s the man who’s the Hentai king?
+Silence… Tenchi looks confused for a moment before realizing that since both Ayeka and Ryoko are gone, there’s no one to sing the next part of the song. Tenchi grabs his belt and sheepishly leaves the ring with Hayes.+
Toro: Well, then… Um…
Guy: Think we’ll ever get a real match tonight?
Toro: Well, the next one certainly has some promise. The main event!
Name: Matthew Atanian
Fanfic Creations: Boy Scouts ½
Most Recent Embarrassment: Realizing that he spent enough at Otakon 1999 to solve all national budget problems.
Name: ????
Fanfic Creations: ????
Most Recent Embarrassment: ????
Toro: Ah, the excitement of a mystery challenger!
Guy: We should find out soon what his or her identity is!
+Cut to ring.+
Vince: (on PA) Entering the ring, wearing the black trench-coat and fedora, none other then the very guy who is typing this as I say it, MATTHEW ATANIAN!!! And coming into the ring from the other corner, a mysterious guy who gets his disguises from Cloaks ‘r’ Us, um… GUY WHOSE NAME I DON’T KNOW!!!
Cloaked Figure: Are you ready to die, Matthew?
Matt: That voice… It couldn’t be…
+The mysterious man throws off his cloak to reveal…+
Toro and Guy: Jason Betrovich!!!!
+Jason is dressed like Roy Bromwell from Rival Schools, wearing tennis shoes, light-blue denim jeans, a white dress shirt with the sleeves partially rolled, black fingerless fighting gloves, a red dress vest, and a dark red tie. +
Matt: Jason!? But why?
Jason: I’ll tell you why… You never return my e-mails any more! You’re too busy with that damned Final Fantasy VIII! “Oh, I’m sorry, Jason, I can’t talk to you now. I’m too busy fantasizing about Rinoa.”
Matt: Actually, not that this helps, but I’m partial to Quistis…
Jason: Not only that, but your website wouldn’t be half as popular as it is if I hadn’t helped you with some promotion… and yet you’ve got over 10,000 hits and I’m not even at 6,000 yet! This is the thanks I get for listing your site on AnimeLinks.com!
Matt: And who do you think listed your site on the Anime Pitstop? And where did you get the idea to join the Anime Fan Fiction Webring? And where did you get the idea to do a first anniversary contest for your website? Hmmm? Some people are so ungrateful…
Jason: Oh yeah? Oh, yeah?!? Well what ever happened to those Ranma tapes I asked you to make for me? One little favor, and I'm still waiting for those tapes!
Matt: Well, okay, I'm starting to see your point...
Jason: And one last thing! Why the fuck can you never even spell my last name right? Have I ever screwed up Atanian? No! I don’t think so! For the last time, asshole, it’s Bertovich, not Betrovich!!!
Guy: Whoops! Hope he didn’t notice!
Toro: Can’t blame us… It was Matt who typed our words.
Guy: Good thinking, Toro. Anyway, with all of this arguing, I think we’re in for a good match at last.
Toro: I hope you’re right.
Mills: All right, you two. I want a good clean fight, I want a nice house in the suburbs, I want a wife, three point four kids, and a dog named Suzy. Now, LET’S GET IT ON!!!
+Bell rings.+
Matt: Now, Jason, I hope you weren’t planning on any fancy Rival Schools techniques. As you know, I’ve barely ever played that game and wouldn’t know how to describe anything as I write this.
Jason: Damn you, Matt. Fine, I guess I’ll just have to resort to stupid, simple, easy to describe moves!
+Jason delivers a swift uppercut to Matt, and then follows that up with a couple of blows to the stomach.+
Jason: How’s that?
Matt: *between coughs and hacks* That… was good… thanks… easy to… type…
+Matt catches his breath+
Matt: But you’re forgetting one crucial thing, Jason-kun…Jason: Oh? What’s that?
Matt: I’m writing this story… I am GOD here! And now a scene from, “Pete, part two.”
+Jason begins flying around, and the sounds of fists impacting with him can be heard. It seems very much like an invisible force is pummeling him.+
Jason: *between coughs and hacks* My complements… that was… good, yourself… but… you’re forgetting something…
Matt: Oh? What’s that?
Jason: You may be writing this story, but you set it in my Universe. Therefore, I am God here, not you! I've let you have your fun long enough. No more games!
Matt: Oh… Oh, shit…
+Jason delivers a swift leaping uppercut to Matt...+
Jason: TWISTER UPPER!!!
+Jason then leaps and slams his fist into the ground, a moment later the ground under Matt explodes...+
Jason: TOUCHDOWN WAVE!!!
+Matt flies into the corner...+
Jason: How’s that? See, you didn't have to lift a finger to get your ass kicked... heh *smirk*
Matt: I commend you... *wipes blood from mouth* But... dammit! QUIT SMIRKING!
Jason: Don't like my smirking, eh? Just for that... heh...
+Jason snaps his fingers and four exact copies of the English Dub Minmei appear around Matt. They begin singing.+
Minmeis: Stage lights, splashing, the feeling’s smashing…
+Matt desperately clutches his ears and screams in inhuman terror.+
Guy: My, God!
Toro: Oh, the humanity!
Audience Member: Hey! Jason! Matt! I challenge whoever wins to a Jell-O wrestling match!
Guy: Was that?
Toro: Yes, it was!
Guy: The Bouncy Goddess herself!
Toro: Fenny Lin!!!
Matt: Jell-O wrestling… with Fenny…
Jason: Oh… Oh, shit…
+Matt suddenly swings his arm in a wide arc, smashing the head of each Minmei as if they were watermelons and his arm was a Sledge-o-matic™.+
Jason: Matt… Friend… I may have been a bit hasty there… Matt?
+Matt grabs Jason by the tie and lifts him off the ground. He swings him in a wide arc, until he’s built up enough force for Jason to reach escape velocity.+
Matt: Jason?
Jason: Yes, Matt?
Matt: Quick trivia question for you... What was the ending theme song for Neon Genesis Evangelion?
Jason: "Fly me to the Moon?"
Matt: Gladly!
Jason: Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
+Matt lets Jason go. Jason goes flying, smashing through the roof. He keeps flying away, disappearing into infinity, still swearing.+
Jason: Screw you Ataniaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn...
Guy: Oh, dear… Who is going to write the next Deathmatch?
Toro: Don’t worry… I think this is all just a dream… I hope… Isn’t it?
+Fenny, wearing a Sailor Fuku, runs onto the ring and throws her arms around Matt. The two walk off into the sunset, hand in hand.+
Guy: *watching Matt and Fenny walk off* Yes, but whose dream?
Toro: Well, that’s all for this evening.
Guy: I’m Guy Makihashi.
Toro: And I’m Toro Watanabe, for all of us at Anime Deathmatch, "We Didn’t Invent Violence, We Just Perfected It." Goodnight!
*End Transmission*
* * *
"What the hell is this?"
JasonBetrovich Bertovich stared at his computer screen in shock. He had just finished reading the new Anime Deathmatch story his friend Matt had just written.
Jason
* * *
Toro Watanabe slowly opened his eyes. Had he dozed off? He must have… He was still seated in the comfortable chair he had flopped into after coming home. Clutched in his hand was the Boy Scouts ½ story he had been reading.
"Thank god," he said, "just a dream."
Or was it?
"Thank god," he said, "just a dream."
Or was it?
Anime Deathmatch © May 1998 to Present by Jason Bertovich.
Anime Deathmatch Boy Scouts ½ II: The Nightmare Continues written by Matthew Atanian, edited by Jason Bertovich, © October 1999 by Matthew Atanian and Jason Bertovich.
Notes from Matt: I had never intended to write a second BS½ ADM, even though many people had written and asked me about the possibility of doing so. However, I was suddenly struck by a muse there was no denying, and I hope you are satisfied with the results.
Notes from Jason: Wow what a dream, within a dream, or am I still dreaming? Or am I even the dreamer?!? FUCK! Now, I'm more screwed up then I was after I saw End of Eva... Thanks Matt, thanks a whole lot... Seriously, This WAS a dream (at least I hope it was...otherwise...well...) Whose dream it was, now that is a question... The PPV is next up... get ready!
Comments? Criticism? Death threats? Send them all to Jason at [email protected] or Matt at [email protected]. Well, send all the death threats to Jason. Matt could do without those. ^_^
Anime Deathmatch Boy Scouts ½ II: The Nightmare Continues written by Matthew Atanian, edited by Jason Bertovich, © October 1999 by Matthew Atanian and Jason Bertovich.
Notes from Matt: I had never intended to write a second BS½ ADM, even though many people had written and asked me about the possibility of doing so. However, I was suddenly struck by a muse there was no denying, and I hope you are satisfied with the results.
Notes from Jason: Wow what a dream, within a dream, or am I still dreaming? Or am I even the dreamer?!? FUCK! Now, I'm more screwed up then I was after I saw End of Eva... Thanks Matt, thanks a whole lot... Seriously, This WAS a dream (at least I hope it was...otherwise...well...) Whose dream it was, now that is a question... The PPV is next up... get ready!
Comments? Criticism? Death threats? Send them all to Jason at [email protected] or Matt at [email protected]. Well, send all the death threats to Jason. Matt could do without those. ^_^