presents a "Perspectives" side story:
Of Possible Futures: The Tale of Neko-chan and Bertovich
a minor story type thing by William Hughes
©1999 by William Hughes, Jason Bertovich, & Matthew Atanian
"Perspectives" created by Jason Bertovich, based on Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
Of Possible Futures: The Tale of Neko-chan and Bertovich
a minor story type thing by William Hughes
©1999 by William Hughes, Jason Bertovich, & Matthew Atanian
"Perspectives" created by Jason Bertovich, based on Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
The Goddess "sat" amongst the darkness of deep space. "She" was currently waiting outside Sol IV, spying on several of Her less evolved creations. A minor bit of robotic technology rumbled about on the reddish planet, while several of Her other creations, a passive race known as the "Dark Rulers of the Universe," or "BOB" in their own language, carried a large pasteboard drawing of some barren landscape, the idea from which was borrowed from the planet Alpha Centauri VII. The omnipotent non-entity watched for a moment, before moving on to her real target.
She passed Sol IV, and moved closer to the relatively minor sun. She stopped at Sol III, known as Earth to its inhabitants and transmaterialized over the patch of Earth known as "Massachusetts."
Below, a young female of the species known as Homo Sapiens (a name which most of the galaxy decided was disgustingly vain, and also quite wrong) was clutching a small white coloured being of the species Felinus Domesticus. Another young male
of the Homo Sapiens was talking to the female. The feline looked agitated.
Using Her omniscience, the Goddess determined that the feline was actually a cursed Homo Sapiens, much to its disadvantage. After all, all Deities know that Felines are much more advanced than Humans are. The Goddess strove to find more. She recognized the burning passion of love that was built in both the feline-human and the slightly evolved male simian. Both of them were striving after the love of the young human female that stood before them.
The Goddess decided that, this being such an unusual case, She would predetermine the events that would shape the lives of all three of these young beings.
The Goddess retreated to Sol LXVII; a planet as yet unrecognized by the primitive humans. On this particular planet, there was a large building that housed a number of Elder Deities. This planet was the home of the Sunnyworld Home for Aging Omnipotent Beings. It was famous for housing such honoured beings as Zeus, Thor, Anubis, and Elvis. The Goddess walked down a hall, then turned into a room.
[Hello,] the room’s occupant "said," [Come to visit me again, dear?]
[Hello, Mother,] the Goddess said, [I need your help.]
[Oh? What is it, Dear?]
[There are these three humans, you see…] the Goddess went on to describe the problem.
[No problem at all, Dear. Just do as I direct…] The elder Deity outlined a simple solution.
The Goddess was delighted. [Thank you, Mother!] she said, [I’ll come back soon, to tell you how it went.]
[I’ll expect you in a decade or two?] the elder Deity said.
[Oh, Mother,] the Goddess said, "giving" the elder a light "kiss." [You know I can’t be back that soon. I’ve got a universe to take care of. Don’t worry, I won’t be more than a century.]
[Of course, dear,] the Elder said.
The Goddess retreated to Her home out beyond the Galactic Ring. Using arcane gestures, mystical words and a VWR (video world recorder), she came up with several possible futures. Randomly picking one, she viewed it.
It was a comfortably run down little house that Jason had bought for his newly wed wife, Nicole. He carried her over the threshold, and she carried her cat. Neko-chan snuggled against Nicole, glaring every moment or two at Jason. The trio found themselves slowly moving towards the kitchen.
Inside the kitchen, Aaron and Kirsten Abdowmassy waited, a delicious smelling turkey sitting on the table.
There was a knock, and Jason hurried over to open the door for his sister- and brother-in-law. Matt held Sarah’s hand as they stepped over several boxes on the way to the kitchen.
Later, after the dinner was over, the food cleaned up, and the guests sent home, Jason and Nicole spent some time watching TV, as Neko-chan slowly plotted the downfall of the evil human…
The Goddess nodded at this one, and set it aside for further perusal later. She couldn’t waste time watching everything; after all, She only had eternity for this project.
Randomly grabbing another future, She popped it into the VWR and "hit" "play."
Darth Bertovich brought his lightsabre to bear on Neko Chanwalker. Nicole Organa stood upon a balcony overlooking the futuristic looking scene.
"Neko," Darth Bertovich hissed, "I am your father."
"No!" Neko Chanwalker yelled, "Old Matt told me you killed my father!"
"Obi-Matt Atanian didn’t tell you? I am your father, Neko. Look to the Force, and you will see it is true."
Screaming a rage of terror mixed with a tablespoon of surprise, a cup of anger and a dash of curiosity, Neko Chanwalker swung his lightsabre around, destroying the surrounding starship as he tried to get in a nice clean blow to Darth Bertovich. The Dark Lord of the Mall calmly deflected his blows, then used some unseen, omnipotent force to cause a cup to move itself under a nearby sink and fill up with cold water. Neko gasped, then used his own abilities to grapple with the Darth Bertovich for control of the debilitating glass of water. Neko may not have been all together too terribly bright, but he did understand quite well that turning into a cat would not be helpful.
The battle raged on, while Nicole Organa calmly ran through the Imperial Data Files. On a whim, she looked up Darth Bertovich, and found the following entry:
"Darth Bertovich, Real Name: Jason Chanwalker. Known progeny: Nicole Organa and Neko Chanwalker…"
Nicole decided that that wasn’t a particularly intelligent whim, and quickly turned off the computer. Turning in her seat, she waved down a passing rogue by the name of Mike Solo, and ran off with him and his co-pilot, Chewbilly the Wookie…
The Goddess "ejected" the "tape" from the VWR and calmly destroyed it. Some things were too weird even for Her.
In went the next possibility…
On a field outside of a small church out in the suburbs, Jason Bertovich and William Hughes stood, sabres unsheathed and waiting. Nicole Porter sat on the sidelines, a worried frown on her face.
"This duel is for the right to date and possibly marry the beauty of the West, Nicole Porter," Hughes called across the field.
Jason nodded. "Agreed."
The twain moved closer, brandishing the swords. Jason swung the blade towards Hughes, who gave an expert twist and sent Jason’s sword flying off into nothingness.
Hughes frowned, then sighed. Setting the his own sword point first into the ground, he crossed his arms and said to Jason, "Go get it."
Jason gulped and rushed over to pick up his recently air-borne weapon. Hughes pulled his own sword out of the ground and set himself in an En Guarde position.
Jason struck again, aiming for Hughes’ feet. Hughes leapt over the blade and thrust at Jason’s shoulder. Jason threw himself to the side to avoid the blow, bringing his own sword back in an effort to hamstring Hughes. Hughes parried the blow, then swung inward, causing Jason to jump back or be disemboweled.
The duelists took a quick step backward, then rushed at each other, swords a-swinging. Hughes got in a lucky blow, the sabre digging deep into Jason’s ribs. Jason gasped, but managed to thrust his own sword into Hughes’ liver.
Both fencers looked down, then up, and spoke their thoughts together. "Oh, shit," they said, before collapsing, to sleep the sleep without dreams.
Nicole gasped, rushed over to the fallen combatants and began to go into hysterics. Reaching down, she grabbed Hughes’ dagger, sticking out of a smaller sheath that had twisted around his back.
Crying mightily, she stuck the blade into her heart, and fell in a heap upon Hughes and Jason.
The Goddess looked at this possibility and set it aside. It was actually quite good. Far off in the Old Deities Home, the Muse of Tragedy suddenly felt better than she had in centuries. In fact, she felt almost as well as she had before that nice Shakespeare boy died.
The Goddess pulled out another possibility and stuck it into her VWR. The tape began to roll…
It was blank. There was nothing. The world had ended several years ago, and the matter of Nicole’s personal affection was unresolved.
The Goddess set this one aside as well. Armageddon scenarios were always fun. In went the next possibility...
The sun shined brightly down on a small house in the outskirts of a small town in a small district of not so small Upstate New York. Hughes stepped out of the house, dressed in a loose pair of corduroy jeans and a large flannel shirt. Stretching rather like a feline, Hughes looked sleepily up at the morning sun. Rubbing a hand across what was rapidly becoming a beard, Hughes stepped inside the house.
Inside, a shortish woman sat at a table, reading a book. She smiled up at Hughes, who smiled back…
The Goddess frowned. That wasn’t Nicole Porter. And where was Jason Bertovich? Still frowning, the Goddess "hit" a "button" on the "tape machine" searching for the other two entities…
Jason Bertovich was still living in Western Massachusetts, and still working in an Electronic Boutique. The Goddess followed him to his new house, closer to work, and watched as he entered. He sat at the kitchen table, and began to read the newspaper. Within a few minutes, the door opened and-voila! -in walked Nicole… except… That wasn’t Nicole, even though she had a remarkable resemblance.
The Goddess frowned again. She "pulled up" a "document" on this new persona, and "read" it.
Julie Heinekens: Born (is being born, will be born) year 48399290 (1979 sol standard). Died (is dying, will die) year 48399364 (2063 sol standard). Possible futures: May marry Jason Bertovich, may marry Frank Canstonza, May become first dictator to rule entire world, may have an unhappy childhood, may die in year 1998, may have children. Predestined Futures: Will marry someone, will enter politics, will be a Scorpio.
The Goddess nodded, then turned back to the "tape" to look for the final persona of the triad, Nicole Porter…
Nicole entered a large house, where she was met by her personal maid, Yvette. She walked into a large counting room, and placed a huge wad of hundred dollar bills on a bench. She turned and called out something, and a small black kitten leapt into her arms. She picked it up, and gave it a huge hug.
The cat was only a year old. She had got it from the local pound when she finally gave up on the search for her old cat Neko-chan who, for some untold reason, her twin-sister Kirsten had accidentally left in upstate New York.
The Goddess nodded to Herself, then placed that particular possibility with the other hopefuls. She "reached down" and grabbed another possibility from the group. She began to view it…
Hughes was leading Nicole through a particularly heavily wooded part of China, looking for the lost tour group. They ran, literally, into a heavyset Chinese man, who looked strangely familiar to Hughes.
"You!" Hughes said suddenly, "You’re that guide who led Matt, Aaron, Mike, Billy and I through China all those years ago."
"Oh, sir," The Guide said in his heavy accent. "You fall in Maoniichuan, I remember."
"Right," Hughes cut him off, nodding sharply, "But right now, we need to get to the airport, ASAP."
"Yes, sir. You follow this way, yes?"
The Guide walked off, with Hughes and Nicole in his wake. Within moments, they were in a remarkably familiar area.
One that Hughes had hoped he would never see again.
The Training Ground of Accursed Springs.
"What!" Hughes yelped, "Here, again?!"
"Yes, sir! Is quickest way to airport."
Hughes sighed. "So long as we don’t go too close to any springs."
"Yes, sir."
The Guide walked off, followed by Nicole and Hughes. Hughes was very careful to keep both himself and Nicole away from any of the springs.
"Oh," Nicole said, "Look at that!" She leaned over one of the springs, pointing at something unseen by either of the males.
"Please, sir," the Guide said to her, "You not know Tragic Story." He looked critically over at Hughes, "Do you?"
"No," Hughes growled. "Nicole, don’t fall in the pool…" He was cut off as a tremendous gust of wind forced him back a step, where he floundered into a spring. The Guide held his footing, but Nicole was hit by a loose tree branch and sent flying into the pool she had been examining.
The Guide sighed, then turned to look at Hughes, who had resurfaced as a cat. "Oh, too bad. You, sir, fall in Maoniichuan, again. You already know Tragic Story. Of course, no big deal for you. You already cursed by that one."
Hughes meowed angrily as he paddled towards shore.
The Guide turned toward Nicole and said…
There was a sudden knock on the door. The Goddess looked up from Her possibility, then walked over to the incessant tapping. She swung the door open, to great a middle aged Deity who wore trousers, suspenders and a white pinstripe shirt. She looked down at Herself, dressed in an old chaos tee-shirt. (Hey, what are supreme being gonna make their clothing outta, huh? Cotton?)
"Oh, dear," the Goddess sub-vocalized. "One life-time," she said to the office-God.
She stepped around a corner, and waved Her hands over Herself. Her clothing fuzzed and became an evening dress. She shook Her head and tried again.
After several billion attempts, She found something She liked, the looked at Her watch. Over several dozen Aeons had passed. "Oops," She said, "stepping" back in time.
She beat Herself to the Door. She looked at Herself, and said, "Why don’t you go get changed, dear?" She nodded and stepped off to complete the cycle.
"Can I help you?" the Goddess said to the office-God.
"Uh, yes," the Deity said, "I’m the God of Copyright Infringement. I was summoned here by Your wild use of proven copyrights. While My clients are willing to forgive You this time, they were wondering if You could please stop?"
"Oh," the Goddess said, startled, "Oh, I hadn’t realized. Quite sorry."
"Oh," the Copyright Infringement God said, "It’s no hassle. By the way, You’ve changed the plots sufficiently to keep Your current possibilities, but please stop Copyright Infringement. I hate My job." With that, the stuffy Deity turned and walked away.
The Goddess sighed, turned back to the pile of possibilities, and set the one she had been looking at aside. She grabbed a new possibility to examine…
Life was good. Jim had a wife, Susan was president, and Gary owned half of the western world’s companies. Unfortunately, none of this had anything to do with Nicole, Jason or Hughes.
Hughes was living on a large farm in upstate New York. He had several horses, a few cows, a number of chickens and many other farm essentials. In fact, aside from the electricity and phone wires, Hughes was completely self-sufficient. He lived alone, with nothing to worry about. It was a carefree life, and he liked it.
Jason was recently promoted to President of Electronic Boutique, and moved to their secret headquarters deep in the Amazon Rainforest. He married a nice local girl, learned to speak Portuguese, and was doing quite well. It was an exciting life, what with computer crashes one minute, and employees getting attacked by alligators the next, and he liked it.
Nicole had created a small business; it made, packaged and sold business books, magazines and software. She also got a degree in law, specializing in what is commonly known as "Out of Court Settlement." It was a fast paced life, and she liked it.
The Goddess considered this possibility. It did create the optimal happiness desired for all parties included, but Nicole’s love was still unresolved. It went into the junk pile.
The Goddess pulled another possibility out of her pile.
Jason looked about, a crooked smile on his battle-scarred face. He grinned at his companion, a tough looking black-haired chap with a nasty looking scar down his eye. "Ready, Nek?" Jason said.
"On your mark, Jase," Hughes said, loosening his gun. No one really knew where he had received his nickname, Nek, but just that he had arrived one day, toting a rifle, a sword when bullets didn’t work, and an aversion to rainstorms.
That was two years back, just after the War that had destroyed most of America, and the rest of the world. Now, bands like this one roamed the land, taking what they could and fighting off other bands.
Currently, this band --they called themselves the Tigers -- where stationed outside a large military complex. It was rumored that inside a band of rogue marines had taken several hostages, among them the beautiful Nicole Porter and her sisters. How Nek had found this information no one knew, but it was common gossip that the night before he presented the info before the table, he had been conversing with a dog and a duck. No one knew why.
Now, Nek and Jason, complete with their squadron of thirty men, prepared to storm the complex, and take it as their own citadel. Jason raised his arm, and the army tensed…
The Goddess nodded to Herself, she would have to make sure one of them was mortally wounded in the fighting, of course, but that would help to determine the outcome of Nicole’s final pledge…
And so the Goddess went on, examining possibilities in which Hughes married Nicole, or Jason married Nicole, or when something disastrous happened to one or two of them. It was a long complicated business, but eventually the Goddess found a possibility that worked. She nodded to Herself, then prepared to put the plan into action. Looking at Her watch, She noticed that the three parties involved were dead by over eight millennia. No problem, the Goddess thought, She could just go back in time a little and…
The universe then had Gib Gnab. The Goddess was suddenly busy with creating a New World, and no longer had anytime left to devote to her previous universe.
Smiling to Herself, she began to recreate worlds.
She passed Sol IV, and moved closer to the relatively minor sun. She stopped at Sol III, known as Earth to its inhabitants and transmaterialized over the patch of Earth known as "Massachusetts."
Below, a young female of the species known as Homo Sapiens (a name which most of the galaxy decided was disgustingly vain, and also quite wrong) was clutching a small white coloured being of the species Felinus Domesticus. Another young male
of the Homo Sapiens was talking to the female. The feline looked agitated.
Using Her omniscience, the Goddess determined that the feline was actually a cursed Homo Sapiens, much to its disadvantage. After all, all Deities know that Felines are much more advanced than Humans are. The Goddess strove to find more. She recognized the burning passion of love that was built in both the feline-human and the slightly evolved male simian. Both of them were striving after the love of the young human female that stood before them.
The Goddess decided that, this being such an unusual case, She would predetermine the events that would shape the lives of all three of these young beings.
The Goddess retreated to Sol LXVII; a planet as yet unrecognized by the primitive humans. On this particular planet, there was a large building that housed a number of Elder Deities. This planet was the home of the Sunnyworld Home for Aging Omnipotent Beings. It was famous for housing such honoured beings as Zeus, Thor, Anubis, and Elvis. The Goddess walked down a hall, then turned into a room.
[Hello,] the room’s occupant "said," [Come to visit me again, dear?]
[Hello, Mother,] the Goddess said, [I need your help.]
[Oh? What is it, Dear?]
[There are these three humans, you see…] the Goddess went on to describe the problem.
[No problem at all, Dear. Just do as I direct…] The elder Deity outlined a simple solution.
The Goddess was delighted. [Thank you, Mother!] she said, [I’ll come back soon, to tell you how it went.]
[I’ll expect you in a decade or two?] the elder Deity said.
[Oh, Mother,] the Goddess said, "giving" the elder a light "kiss." [You know I can’t be back that soon. I’ve got a universe to take care of. Don’t worry, I won’t be more than a century.]
[Of course, dear,] the Elder said.
The Goddess retreated to Her home out beyond the Galactic Ring. Using arcane gestures, mystical words and a VWR (video world recorder), she came up with several possible futures. Randomly picking one, she viewed it.
It was a comfortably run down little house that Jason had bought for his newly wed wife, Nicole. He carried her over the threshold, and she carried her cat. Neko-chan snuggled against Nicole, glaring every moment or two at Jason. The trio found themselves slowly moving towards the kitchen.
Inside the kitchen, Aaron and Kirsten Abdowmassy waited, a delicious smelling turkey sitting on the table.
There was a knock, and Jason hurried over to open the door for his sister- and brother-in-law. Matt held Sarah’s hand as they stepped over several boxes on the way to the kitchen.
Later, after the dinner was over, the food cleaned up, and the guests sent home, Jason and Nicole spent some time watching TV, as Neko-chan slowly plotted the downfall of the evil human…
The Goddess nodded at this one, and set it aside for further perusal later. She couldn’t waste time watching everything; after all, She only had eternity for this project.
Randomly grabbing another future, She popped it into the VWR and "hit" "play."
Darth Bertovich brought his lightsabre to bear on Neko Chanwalker. Nicole Organa stood upon a balcony overlooking the futuristic looking scene.
"Neko," Darth Bertovich hissed, "I am your father."
"No!" Neko Chanwalker yelled, "Old Matt told me you killed my father!"
"Obi-Matt Atanian didn’t tell you? I am your father, Neko. Look to the Force, and you will see it is true."
Screaming a rage of terror mixed with a tablespoon of surprise, a cup of anger and a dash of curiosity, Neko Chanwalker swung his lightsabre around, destroying the surrounding starship as he tried to get in a nice clean blow to Darth Bertovich. The Dark Lord of the Mall calmly deflected his blows, then used some unseen, omnipotent force to cause a cup to move itself under a nearby sink and fill up with cold water. Neko gasped, then used his own abilities to grapple with the Darth Bertovich for control of the debilitating glass of water. Neko may not have been all together too terribly bright, but he did understand quite well that turning into a cat would not be helpful.
The battle raged on, while Nicole Organa calmly ran through the Imperial Data Files. On a whim, she looked up Darth Bertovich, and found the following entry:
"Darth Bertovich, Real Name: Jason Chanwalker. Known progeny: Nicole Organa and Neko Chanwalker…"
Nicole decided that that wasn’t a particularly intelligent whim, and quickly turned off the computer. Turning in her seat, she waved down a passing rogue by the name of Mike Solo, and ran off with him and his co-pilot, Chewbilly the Wookie…
The Goddess "ejected" the "tape" from the VWR and calmly destroyed it. Some things were too weird even for Her.
In went the next possibility…
On a field outside of a small church out in the suburbs, Jason Bertovich and William Hughes stood, sabres unsheathed and waiting. Nicole Porter sat on the sidelines, a worried frown on her face.
"This duel is for the right to date and possibly marry the beauty of the West, Nicole Porter," Hughes called across the field.
Jason nodded. "Agreed."
The twain moved closer, brandishing the swords. Jason swung the blade towards Hughes, who gave an expert twist and sent Jason’s sword flying off into nothingness.
Hughes frowned, then sighed. Setting the his own sword point first into the ground, he crossed his arms and said to Jason, "Go get it."
Jason gulped and rushed over to pick up his recently air-borne weapon. Hughes pulled his own sword out of the ground and set himself in an En Guarde position.
Jason struck again, aiming for Hughes’ feet. Hughes leapt over the blade and thrust at Jason’s shoulder. Jason threw himself to the side to avoid the blow, bringing his own sword back in an effort to hamstring Hughes. Hughes parried the blow, then swung inward, causing Jason to jump back or be disemboweled.
The duelists took a quick step backward, then rushed at each other, swords a-swinging. Hughes got in a lucky blow, the sabre digging deep into Jason’s ribs. Jason gasped, but managed to thrust his own sword into Hughes’ liver.
Both fencers looked down, then up, and spoke their thoughts together. "Oh, shit," they said, before collapsing, to sleep the sleep without dreams.
Nicole gasped, rushed over to the fallen combatants and began to go into hysterics. Reaching down, she grabbed Hughes’ dagger, sticking out of a smaller sheath that had twisted around his back.
Crying mightily, she stuck the blade into her heart, and fell in a heap upon Hughes and Jason.
The Goddess looked at this possibility and set it aside. It was actually quite good. Far off in the Old Deities Home, the Muse of Tragedy suddenly felt better than she had in centuries. In fact, she felt almost as well as she had before that nice Shakespeare boy died.
The Goddess pulled out another possibility and stuck it into her VWR. The tape began to roll…
It was blank. There was nothing. The world had ended several years ago, and the matter of Nicole’s personal affection was unresolved.
The Goddess set this one aside as well. Armageddon scenarios were always fun. In went the next possibility...
The sun shined brightly down on a small house in the outskirts of a small town in a small district of not so small Upstate New York. Hughes stepped out of the house, dressed in a loose pair of corduroy jeans and a large flannel shirt. Stretching rather like a feline, Hughes looked sleepily up at the morning sun. Rubbing a hand across what was rapidly becoming a beard, Hughes stepped inside the house.
Inside, a shortish woman sat at a table, reading a book. She smiled up at Hughes, who smiled back…
The Goddess frowned. That wasn’t Nicole Porter. And where was Jason Bertovich? Still frowning, the Goddess "hit" a "button" on the "tape machine" searching for the other two entities…
Jason Bertovich was still living in Western Massachusetts, and still working in an Electronic Boutique. The Goddess followed him to his new house, closer to work, and watched as he entered. He sat at the kitchen table, and began to read the newspaper. Within a few minutes, the door opened and-voila! -in walked Nicole… except… That wasn’t Nicole, even though she had a remarkable resemblance.
The Goddess frowned again. She "pulled up" a "document" on this new persona, and "read" it.
Julie Heinekens: Born (is being born, will be born) year 48399290 (1979 sol standard). Died (is dying, will die) year 48399364 (2063 sol standard). Possible futures: May marry Jason Bertovich, may marry Frank Canstonza, May become first dictator to rule entire world, may have an unhappy childhood, may die in year 1998, may have children. Predestined Futures: Will marry someone, will enter politics, will be a Scorpio.
The Goddess nodded, then turned back to the "tape" to look for the final persona of the triad, Nicole Porter…
Nicole entered a large house, where she was met by her personal maid, Yvette. She walked into a large counting room, and placed a huge wad of hundred dollar bills on a bench. She turned and called out something, and a small black kitten leapt into her arms. She picked it up, and gave it a huge hug.
The cat was only a year old. She had got it from the local pound when she finally gave up on the search for her old cat Neko-chan who, for some untold reason, her twin-sister Kirsten had accidentally left in upstate New York.
The Goddess nodded to Herself, then placed that particular possibility with the other hopefuls. She "reached down" and grabbed another possibility from the group. She began to view it…
Hughes was leading Nicole through a particularly heavily wooded part of China, looking for the lost tour group. They ran, literally, into a heavyset Chinese man, who looked strangely familiar to Hughes.
"You!" Hughes said suddenly, "You’re that guide who led Matt, Aaron, Mike, Billy and I through China all those years ago."
"Oh, sir," The Guide said in his heavy accent. "You fall in Maoniichuan, I remember."
"Right," Hughes cut him off, nodding sharply, "But right now, we need to get to the airport, ASAP."
"Yes, sir. You follow this way, yes?"
The Guide walked off, with Hughes and Nicole in his wake. Within moments, they were in a remarkably familiar area.
One that Hughes had hoped he would never see again.
The Training Ground of Accursed Springs.
"What!" Hughes yelped, "Here, again?!"
"Yes, sir! Is quickest way to airport."
Hughes sighed. "So long as we don’t go too close to any springs."
"Yes, sir."
The Guide walked off, followed by Nicole and Hughes. Hughes was very careful to keep both himself and Nicole away from any of the springs.
"Oh," Nicole said, "Look at that!" She leaned over one of the springs, pointing at something unseen by either of the males.
"Please, sir," the Guide said to her, "You not know Tragic Story." He looked critically over at Hughes, "Do you?"
"No," Hughes growled. "Nicole, don’t fall in the pool…" He was cut off as a tremendous gust of wind forced him back a step, where he floundered into a spring. The Guide held his footing, but Nicole was hit by a loose tree branch and sent flying into the pool she had been examining.
The Guide sighed, then turned to look at Hughes, who had resurfaced as a cat. "Oh, too bad. You, sir, fall in Maoniichuan, again. You already know Tragic Story. Of course, no big deal for you. You already cursed by that one."
Hughes meowed angrily as he paddled towards shore.
The Guide turned toward Nicole and said…
There was a sudden knock on the door. The Goddess looked up from Her possibility, then walked over to the incessant tapping. She swung the door open, to great a middle aged Deity who wore trousers, suspenders and a white pinstripe shirt. She looked down at Herself, dressed in an old chaos tee-shirt. (Hey, what are supreme being gonna make their clothing outta, huh? Cotton?)
"Oh, dear," the Goddess sub-vocalized. "One life-time," she said to the office-God.
She stepped around a corner, and waved Her hands over Herself. Her clothing fuzzed and became an evening dress. She shook Her head and tried again.
After several billion attempts, She found something She liked, the looked at Her watch. Over several dozen Aeons had passed. "Oops," She said, "stepping" back in time.
She beat Herself to the Door. She looked at Herself, and said, "Why don’t you go get changed, dear?" She nodded and stepped off to complete the cycle.
"Can I help you?" the Goddess said to the office-God.
"Uh, yes," the Deity said, "I’m the God of Copyright Infringement. I was summoned here by Your wild use of proven copyrights. While My clients are willing to forgive You this time, they were wondering if You could please stop?"
"Oh," the Goddess said, startled, "Oh, I hadn’t realized. Quite sorry."
"Oh," the Copyright Infringement God said, "It’s no hassle. By the way, You’ve changed the plots sufficiently to keep Your current possibilities, but please stop Copyright Infringement. I hate My job." With that, the stuffy Deity turned and walked away.
The Goddess sighed, turned back to the pile of possibilities, and set the one she had been looking at aside. She grabbed a new possibility to examine…
Life was good. Jim had a wife, Susan was president, and Gary owned half of the western world’s companies. Unfortunately, none of this had anything to do with Nicole, Jason or Hughes.
Hughes was living on a large farm in upstate New York. He had several horses, a few cows, a number of chickens and many other farm essentials. In fact, aside from the electricity and phone wires, Hughes was completely self-sufficient. He lived alone, with nothing to worry about. It was a carefree life, and he liked it.
Jason was recently promoted to President of Electronic Boutique, and moved to their secret headquarters deep in the Amazon Rainforest. He married a nice local girl, learned to speak Portuguese, and was doing quite well. It was an exciting life, what with computer crashes one minute, and employees getting attacked by alligators the next, and he liked it.
Nicole had created a small business; it made, packaged and sold business books, magazines and software. She also got a degree in law, specializing in what is commonly known as "Out of Court Settlement." It was a fast paced life, and she liked it.
The Goddess considered this possibility. It did create the optimal happiness desired for all parties included, but Nicole’s love was still unresolved. It went into the junk pile.
The Goddess pulled another possibility out of her pile.
Jason looked about, a crooked smile on his battle-scarred face. He grinned at his companion, a tough looking black-haired chap with a nasty looking scar down his eye. "Ready, Nek?" Jason said.
"On your mark, Jase," Hughes said, loosening his gun. No one really knew where he had received his nickname, Nek, but just that he had arrived one day, toting a rifle, a sword when bullets didn’t work, and an aversion to rainstorms.
That was two years back, just after the War that had destroyed most of America, and the rest of the world. Now, bands like this one roamed the land, taking what they could and fighting off other bands.
Currently, this band --they called themselves the Tigers -- where stationed outside a large military complex. It was rumored that inside a band of rogue marines had taken several hostages, among them the beautiful Nicole Porter and her sisters. How Nek had found this information no one knew, but it was common gossip that the night before he presented the info before the table, he had been conversing with a dog and a duck. No one knew why.
Now, Nek and Jason, complete with their squadron of thirty men, prepared to storm the complex, and take it as their own citadel. Jason raised his arm, and the army tensed…
The Goddess nodded to Herself, she would have to make sure one of them was mortally wounded in the fighting, of course, but that would help to determine the outcome of Nicole’s final pledge…
And so the Goddess went on, examining possibilities in which Hughes married Nicole, or Jason married Nicole, or when something disastrous happened to one or two of them. It was a long complicated business, but eventually the Goddess found a possibility that worked. She nodded to Herself, then prepared to put the plan into action. Looking at Her watch, She noticed that the three parties involved were dead by over eight millennia. No problem, the Goddess thought, She could just go back in time a little and…
The universe then had Gib Gnab. The Goddess was suddenly busy with creating a New World, and no longer had anytime left to devote to her previous universe.
Smiling to Herself, she began to recreate worlds.
The End.
I just love cliff-hangers, don’t you? He he…
I just love cliff-hangers, don’t you? He he…
Matt's End of Story Comments
Well, this seems to be a further extension to the oddness of Boy Scouts ½. I speak of the series itself, not the content of the stories. Where else could you have a side story to a spin-off of a fanfic? I guess Hughes took it personally when Jason started to get interested in Nicole and had to do something about it… Calm down, Hughes! She’s fictional!!
Anywho, some brief comments on continuity: In Perspectives III, Jason revealed that Fenny is a Goddess, and the Goddess who is orchestrating things in this story seems to be a very different type of Goddess. Is it possible for the Goddess in this story to co-exist in a reality with Fenny and her sisters, and whatever divine organization they work for? I don’t know. That’s up to Jason, I suppose, but as I doubt he’ll addresses the issue, let’s just assume that there are at least two separate and distinct organizations of deities in the Universe. (Would certainly explain why it’s such an odd place…) He’s under no obligation to consider this canonical (even though it would be nice if he did).
Lastly, the usual disclaimer stuff: There’s references in this story to Ranma ½, of course, as well as Star Wars and probably a few other things I just missed. (It’s almost 2:30 a.m. as I type this disclaimer, keep in mind.) It was all without permission of their respective owners, as the God of Copyright Infringement is no doubt obliged to inform you.
Anywho, some brief comments on continuity: In Perspectives III, Jason revealed that Fenny is a Goddess, and the Goddess who is orchestrating things in this story seems to be a very different type of Goddess. Is it possible for the Goddess in this story to co-exist in a reality with Fenny and her sisters, and whatever divine organization they work for? I don’t know. That’s up to Jason, I suppose, but as I doubt he’ll addresses the issue, let’s just assume that there are at least two separate and distinct organizations of deities in the Universe. (Would certainly explain why it’s such an odd place…) He’s under no obligation to consider this canonical (even though it would be nice if he did).
Lastly, the usual disclaimer stuff: There’s references in this story to Ranma ½, of course, as well as Star Wars and probably a few other things I just missed. (It’s almost 2:30 a.m. as I type this disclaimer, keep in mind.) It was all without permission of their respective owners, as the God of Copyright Infringement is no doubt obliged to inform you.
Jason's End of Story Comments
Well, I guess I should be flattered that Bill decided that I'm his new arch enemy. Question: WHY AM I USUALLY THE BAD GUY?!?! Darth Bertovich?...Hmmm...Probably should have been Darth Mall. (Bad pun, I'm sorry...*bow*)
On the subject of goddesses and gods, and immortal omnipotent beings...
OK, Fenny is a member of a Immortal group of Dieties that deal with mankind. But as with most things, they do not have knowledge of these gods, who are actually higher up the scale, and who knows? Maybe their are beings higher up the scale of this Being who are messing with reality themselves? Ugh! This is giving me a headache! Let's put it simple. There are two sets of dieties. But Fenny's group doesn't know of the second, and the second don't care about Fenny's so I guess this story is cannonical...um...yeah.
If Bill has tensions toward me now, wait until he reads the dreaded "first Meeting" Between Jason and Neko-chan in Part 5, which is the final "Perspectives" story, but who knows what the future holds after that.
Um...that's it, Kudos to Bill for this work, and kudos to you for reading the Perspectives series. As always Feedback is welcome to all the BS ½ writers...so SEND FEEDBACK!!!
On the subject of goddesses and gods, and immortal omnipotent beings...
OK, Fenny is a member of a Immortal group of Dieties that deal with mankind. But as with most things, they do not have knowledge of these gods, who are actually higher up the scale, and who knows? Maybe their are beings higher up the scale of this Being who are messing with reality themselves? Ugh! This is giving me a headache! Let's put it simple. There are two sets of dieties. But Fenny's group doesn't know of the second, and the second don't care about Fenny's so I guess this story is cannonical...um...yeah.
If Bill has tensions toward me now, wait until he reads the dreaded "first Meeting" Between Jason and Neko-chan in Part 5, which is the final "Perspectives" story, but who knows what the future holds after that.
Um...that's it, Kudos to Bill for this work, and kudos to you for reading the Perspectives series. As always Feedback is welcome to all the BS ½ writers...so SEND FEEDBACK!!!