part 11:
Matty's New Wardrobe?
Shopping Spree from Hell
by Matthew Atanian
with Carolyn Ede
©1999 by Matthew Atanian and Carolyn Ede
Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
Matty's New Wardrobe?
Shopping Spree from Hell
by Matthew Atanian
with Carolyn Ede
©1999 by Matthew Atanian and Carolyn Ede
Boy Scouts ½ created by Matthew Atanian
Matthew Atanian stood in front of his friend, Carolyn Ede, holding a hose and turning the nozzle that caused cold water to spray from it. He held the hose away from himself, but momentarily that would change.
Carolyn and he shared a very special friendship. Matt had once commented to her that their friendship was like a marriage without sex, and that it was. They had shared good times and bad, better and worse, sickness and health, and would be friends at least until death did they part. Matt felt he would be able to share most anything with Carolyn, including a certain after effect of a trip to China not too long ago, something that thus far he had only shared with few other then those who were directly involved.
Matt probably wouldn't even be telling Carolyn, not that he didn't trust her, except that he had an important favour to ask of her, something he could ask of no other living soul on the face of the Earth...
It all started a few days prior...
Matt was going out with Sarah. He was actually going out with Sarah! Well, if one were to be technical, he wasn't the one going out with her, which he now found himself reluctantly explaining to his friends. "Well, it's not exactly a romantic date, or anything," he said slowly, prolonging the inevitable. "It's more a sort-of as-friends thing. It's actually sort of..." He coughed suddenly. "A girls night out."
Mike, Aaron, Kirstin, and the Bills took this in without one bit of shock. They were sort of expecting it. They would have been surprised if it was a romantic date.
"WHAT?" Becker yelled.
Suddenly, a thought occurred to Kirstin. She took Matt aside, where the others couldn't hear, and asked Matt one question that put him into complete and total shock.
"What are you going to wear?"
In the distance, Becker shouted, "WHAT?"
The Boy Scout meeting proceeded with its usual chaotic turmoil. Justy did his usual routine of barking insane orders and attempting to maintain totalitarian control over the other boys. It was futile.
Inevitably, the meeting drew to a close. Matt said goodnight to everyone and made a hasty exit, saying he had some phone calls to make.
Aaron began to make his way outside, closely followed by Mike, Kenny, and the Bills. Kenny walked with his eyes firmly planted in his book, controlling his speed and direction by listening to the others' footsteps.
"Aaron?" a voice called out, just before he reached the door to go outside.
He stopped, his hand poised over the doorknob. Kenny bumped into him, looked up from his book, and apologized.
Aaron turned to see Kirstin, whose meeting had also just ended, heading towards his group. "Hi, everyone," she said as she joined them.
"Did you want something?" he her asked good-naturedly.
"As a matter of fact, yes," Kirstin replied. She pulled from her pocket a deck of cards. Magic cards. She smiled. "Teach me?" she asked.
"S–sure," Aaron responded. Then, "What made you want to learn how to play Magic?"
"Well, you all seem to enjoy it so much," she explained. "After all, you still play it even though you're all cursed in part because of it. I thought it must be a fun game." She frowned. "I fear I can't make much sense of the rulebook, however."
"The rulebook," Mike suddenly decreed, "is not to be understood by normal humans. It's wisdom is wisest used by those who already know how to play."
Everyone looked at Mike as if he'd suddenly grown a third eye. That was an unusually worded comment, even for him.
"In other words," Gelinas said, "learn from people who already know how to play, and just use the rulebook as a reference."
Kirstin nodded. "So that's how it works." She smiled again. "So are all of you free Sunday night?"
Aaron blinked. "Sunday... That's the day that Sarah and Matt... and Matty..."
Kirstin did a simultaneous nod, blink, and smile that caused Aaron's heart to skip a beat. He looked to his friends. "Magic at Kirstin's, Sunday night?"
"Sure!" Mike said.
"If we can," Hughes added in an oddly cheerfully pessimistic voice.
"There a problem?" Kirstin asked Hughes.
"Well," he responded, "this wouldn't exactly be a typical get together with the guys."
It always annoyed the others on those rare moments of clarity in which Hughes said something comprehensible and intelligent.
"That's right." Aaron frowned. "Two women present. No supervision." Aaron's sudden frown deepened.
Mike shrugged. "You never know. It could happen."
Kirstin smiled again, oddly confident. "I'm sure it will. You'll all call me and let me know?" She walked over to the door, smiling at Aaron as she passed him. "Aaron has my number."
Kenny suddenly spoke, startling everyone. "I can make it, fore sure," he said.
"Great!" Kirstin said. "One down, four to go. Sunday!" she said, as the door closed behind her.
Later that night...
"Hello?"
"Hi, Carolyn, it's Matt."
"Oh, hi!"
"Um, I can't talk long. I was just wondering, you busy this Saturday?"
"No. Why do you ask?"
"Um... think I can come over? I've got something to tell you, and a big favour to ask."
"What is it?"
"I'll tell you Saturday. Don't worry, it's nothing evil."
"If you say so."
"I wish I could talk longer, but I have some other calls to make."
"Okay. What time Saturday?"
"The earlier, the better. Noon-ish okay with you?"
"I can deal with that. It'll be good to see you."
"Same here. We should get together more often. I'll take the bus down. Can you meet me in the Centre of Amherst?"
"Sure."
"Well, I gotta go. See you Saturday."
"Okay. Bye. I love you."
"Love you, too, bye."
Matt hung up the phone, doused himself with cold water, and picked up the phone again. As she dialled a number she read off a slightly damp piece of paper, she stirred her iced tea nervously.
"Hello?"
"Um, hello. Is Sarah there?"
"Who's asking?"
"It's Matty Hayes."
"You want to talk to Sarah?"
"Yes."
"One dollar."
"Nicole?" Matty asked.
"Give me a dollar next time you see me."
In the distance, Matty heard, "Nicole? Who's the phone for?"
"Oh, um, here..."
"Hello?"
"Sarah?"
"Matty? Hi! We on for Sunday?"
"Um, of course."
"Good. What's your address? I can pick you up around five if that's good for you."
"Actually... my house can be hard to find. You know a restaurant called Russell's, right on Boston Road?"
"Of course."
"You can pick me up there."
"Okay! See you Sunday!"
Three days later, Matt walked off of a bus in the centre of Amherst. He immediately saw Carolyn. She was an attractive woman, with shoulder length once-blond hair that had darkened in the years since they had first met. As they embraced, two friends who saw each other not nearly as often as either would like, Matt felt some of the tension that had steadily been building within him since Wednesday drain away.
The two of them had first met in high school, when he was a Senior and she a Sophomore. They both agreed that their friendship was one of the best things that they'd gotten out of the time they spent as Springfield Central High School.
Early on, Matt had had feelings for her other then friendship, but the simple fact was that Carolyn's preferences had one thing in common with his own that would prevent anything happening between them: gender. Matt still had "what if" thoughts once every great once in a while, but quickly buried them for three reasons: 1) It would never happen, 2) He was very content with their friendship, and 3) Sarah. (Albeit, the last reason was only a recent one.)
They travelled to the house Carolyn lived in, catching up a bit on the way. It was a large house, a couple of floors to it, and sat upon a very large piece of land. The back yard was dominated by cornstalks, all harvested and waiting for winter to come and go so that they might produce their bounty once again. The house itself wasn't pretty, nor was it ugly. If anything, it had a comfortable, "lived in" look to it.
Carolyn was about to step inside, assuming that Matt was following her. He had stopped at the foot of the steps, however. Realizing this, Carolyn stopped and turned.
"Carolyn, remember my saying that I had something to tell you?"
She looked both concerned and curious. "Yes?"
"It'd probably be simpler to show you. Do you have a hose?"
Carolyn nodded and led him to it. Matt stood in front of her, taking hold of the hose and turning the nozzle that caused cold water to spray from it. He held the hose away from himself, but momentarily that would change.
"Remember that trip to China I took with the Boy Scouts?" Matt asked her. She nodded, and he continued. "While there, the five of us visited an ancient Martial Arts training ground, a ground of cursed springs. If you fall into one of these springs, you... change..." As he spoke, he removed his coat and hat and tossed them aside.
Carolyn looked at him, puzzled. Her puzzlement faded away, and a blank expression replaced it, as Matt turned the hose on himself.
The first thing she noticed was that the water seemed to turn Matt's hair from black to red. She then, almost immediately afterwards, noticed that Matt's body seemed to have changed shape... in certain ways...
Matty stood before Carolyn.
"Matt?" Carolyn said a moment later.
"That's me," Matty responded.
"Oh, my," Carolyn simply said. She calmly sat down on a nearby log and stared off into the corn field.
Matty sat beside her. She's taking this rather calmly, she thought.
The two of them sat, calmly gazing at the cornstalks. A few birds flew by. In the distance, a crow called out. A slight breeze played with Carolyn's hair.
"Fuck!!" Carolyn bolted to her feet, a more then mild look of surprise on her face. "Matt, you're a woman!!"
Matty nodded. "So," she asked, "still no chance for the two of us?"
This seemed to bring Carolyn back down to Earth. Knowing Matty was only joking, she responded, "Well, Matt, I don't know..." She smirked. She had also been joking.
Matty smiled. "Actually, I've assumed the name 'Matty' when I'm female. Matty Hayes."
"So what exactly is going on here?" Carolyn asked. She was definitely over the initial shock, and was asking more for informational purposes then out of confusion.
Matty explained everything to her that she knew about the curse and how it worked. It didn't take long, but by the time they were finished, they were inside and Matty was drying herself off with a towel Carolyn had offered.
"So what was this favour you said you needed?" Carolyn asked after they had sat down.
"Well, there's this woman I like," Matty began.
"Way to go, Matt!" Carolyn said, pleased.
"Yeah, well, she kind of hates me, but she's also sort of becoming friends with 'Matty,'" Matty said. "She doesn't know that Matt and Matty are the same person."
Carolyn nodded, listening as Matty continued.
"Well, she and Matty are going out Sunday night, and, er, I sort of was wondering... well... do you have anything I... I can w... wear...?"
Matty had left her coat and hat at Carolyn's, and through the miracle of public transportation, the two of them made their way to the Holyoke Mall after Carolyn had insisted that Matty should have clothes of her own rather then just borrowing some of hers.
"First, let's go to the lingerie store....this is a date isn't it....wink wink, nudge nudge?"
Matty coughed. "Um... it's more an 'as friends' thing, you know. Anyways, why do I need ladies underwear? It's not as if she's going to see under my clothes..."
"How unlucky. Well, depending on what you wear, you may need a bra, or stockings, or women's undies. I'm not an advocate of that crap, but I would pay me cash money to see you decked out like that!"
Matty was sure her face was probably a rather interesting shade of red, but somehow she found herself persuaded by Carolyn's words. With still a little reluctance, she told Carolyn to lead the way.
Victoria's Secret was pink and plush. It looked to both as though a care bear had wandered in and exploded. It smelled of perfume that only a supermodel would wear for cash or a Home-Ec Teacher would wear in hope of romance.
Matty looked around at all of the frilly and lacy things that were quite alien to her. She looked at Carolyn with a panicked expression. "Help," she peeped.
Carolyn was looking kind of green, frightened, and altogether unhelpful herself. "Here," she mumbled pointing to a chirpy looking saleswoman..."she'll tell us what to do"
Matty looked at the saleswoman, and looked back at Carolyn. "Um, Carolyn...?"
The saleslady, as if on cue walked towards them. The sight was not comforting, she was short, perky looking, and walked with the purposeful swing of someone who knew their way around a pair of panties. "Hello, how may I help you young ladies...perhaps something with a bit of push up 'oomph'?"
Matty reddened again. "I don't need anything fancy... just some girls underwear."
The sales lady looked like she would all of a sudden rather be elsewhere. "Weelllllll...I'm sure you will be able to find your way around without my help.....you're in the right place for WOMENS underwear."
As the saleslady walked away in a pretentious huff, Matty again turned to Carolyn. "So, um... what do you think I'd look good in?" She coughed slightly.
"Green. Redheads always look good in green, or black. No pink...Maybe a nice dark blue or cream colour as well. "
After a moment of thought, she added, "Try to stay away from g-string underwear, it is like having your butt flossed. And I will kill you if you go near the polyester".
Minutes later, they were headed toward the posh dressing room with an armload of cotton underthings.
"Hurry up Matty, all this pink is giving me a headache."
Matty nervously went into one of the gaudy stalls, and began to undress. She was somewhat nervous, as this was her first time undressing in a public place as a woman. She had an odd feeling she was being watched, and quickly ducked her head out of the stall. No one could be seen, but she thought she heard the faint sound of a bell.
A moment later, Matty had slipped into a pair of panties and was attempting to get a bra clasped behind her back, with little success. Perhaps she'd be having better luck if her social life had given her more of an opportunity at undoing the things, but alas this was not the case. Her fingers fumbled over the clasp for the umpteenth time, still without success. With the nervousness that had been with her throughout this entire venture, she called out, "Um, Carolyn, how do I get this thing closed?"
Carolyn opened the door and clasped the bra, only fumbling for a moment.
"Here Matty, let me show you an easier way to do this," Carolyn said as she demonstrated clasping the bra from the front and turning it around.
Matty thanked her. "So, um... how do I look?"
"You look absolutely stunning."
Matty smiled, despite the embarrassment. Carolyn left, and Matty tried on a few other things before picking out a few assorted items. She put her normal clothes back on, and together she and Carolyn went and paid for them. "Well, I suppose now I need something to wear over these," Matty said, holding up the frilly Victoria Secret's bag.
Carolyn and Matty headed for the nearest directory. Already at the directory stood an Asian man dressed in yellow, who had been staring at the multi-coloured plastic for quite some time.
He continued looking at the sign. He tilted his head at a forty-five degree angle hoping that would clarify things. It didn't. He was beginning to visibly fume in anger. It still told him the same thing it had been telling him for the last fifteen minutes: "YOU ARE HERE --> *"
"Great," he said quietly to himself, "I am here."
He began to grit his teeth and Matty and Carolyn were a little surprised when he started to glow slightly...
Matty and Carolyn backed away a bit, just before the man screamed, "SO WHERE THE HELL AM I NOW?!!?" He followed this ten seconds later with a primal scream, and then he screamed "SHISHI HOKOUDAN!!!" There was an explosion.
Matty and Carolyn looked at each other then at the sales clerk whose name tag read "Jason" who was standing in front of the local Electronics Boutique. He just shrugged his shoulders. A second later the melted, charred remains of the mall directory landed behind them. It was their turn to shrug their shoulders and they walked on.
A minute later, the sales clerk who was still standing in front of the store noticed the Asian gentleman in the yellow bandana approaching him. "Ok," he said to himself, "Get into Customer Service mode." He walked up to the young man and said "Hi, is there anything I can help you find today?"
The Asian man in the bandana responded by grabbing the young sales clerk's collar, lifting him off his feet and looking straight into his eyes. "Where is Furinkan High School?"
Matty and Carolyn managed to make their way to Filenes even without the assistance of a directory. They then made their way to the women's department, and there was a saleswoman there who seemed rather unlike the one from Victoria's Secret. This saleswoman seemed like she'd actually be helpful.
She was Asian as well, but didn't seem like she'd be destroying any mall directories any time soon. She had a smile on her face as she watched the two of them approach. She helped close the distance between herself and the approaching customers, going towards Matty and Carolyn with a bouncy walk.
"Hi, I'm Fenny," she said, pushing up her glasses. "Can I help you?"
"Um," Matty said, "I need some clothes."
"Ah, I can definitely help you then. Can I show you some t-shirts perhaps?"
"Actually," Carolyn stated, "she was more looking for some dresses, I think."
"Sure thing!" Fenny cheerily answered. She led Matty and Carolyn to some racks. "You're in luck, we're having a sale today."
Carolyn looked through the racks a bit and pulled out a green halter style top. "What about this? Might go good with some loose black drawstring pants."
"I suppose," Matty said.
Fenny appeared with pants matching Carolyn's description. "You know," she then said, "with your curves, I might also suggest something that clings a bit. There's this short, black silk number that I've been eyeing myself that would look pretty good on you, I think."
Matty nodded, and Fenny walked off again, and reappeared with the dress she had just described. "I think we have a winner," Carolyn said. "Matty, go try 'em on!"
Matty went into the dressing room and tried on the halter top and pants first. She came back out and looked in the mirror. "What do you think?" she asked.
Carolyn gave her approval, as did Fenny. "Now go try on that dress," Carolyn suggested.
Matty returned to the dressing room, and slipped into the dress. She had to leave her men's underwear off, as it would show under the dress, but she was pretty sure she wouldn't have the same problem when she was wearing panties. The dress was a bit low cut in the front, but not too immodest, and clung to her body somewhat snugly. The skirt stopped midway between her hips and knees. It was, Matty thought, a rather nice dress.
She left the dressing room, and again modelled for Carolyn and Fenny. "Nice," Carolyn said.
"I suppose I'll take them both," Matty said. She looked at herself in the mirror, wearing the dress, and was alarmed to find that she found the sight of herself was... well, never mind.
She went to a register and Fenny rang up the purchase. "Thank you very much!" she said.
"Can my friend go back into the dressing room and change into the dress?" Carolyn asked.
"What?" Matty responded.
"Of course," Fenny said. "It's all paid for, so you can do what you'd like with it."
They headed back to the dressing room. "But why?" Matty asked.
"Well," Carolyn said, "you should get used to wearing a dress before tomorrow. Besides... I like how you look in it."
They had reached the dressing rooms, and Carolyn handed Matty the Filenes bag, as well as the Victoria's Secret one.
"Oh, okay," Matty said as she returned to the dressing room.
Their next stop was Filenes' shoe department. Matty was worried about walking in high heals, but luckily Carolyn advised against them, saying she hated heals anyway. The guy in the shoe department, John, was kind enough to suggest some black pumps which matched the dress that Matty was wearing, and also went with the halter top / pants combo she had also bought. "I think these would look good on you," he said. "Hey baby, those shoes will really set you on fire...after I light it up for ya!"
Matty and Carolyn both gave John a quite funny look, but Matty had to agree that the shoes were good, and so she bought them. As she walked away from the register, John watched her and Carolyn walk away.
"Yes, I've made a sale," John said.
And then he laughed.
It was a laugh that Matty thought sounded familiar, like a certain character from a Pioneer anime series, and also like a laugh of a certain SPL.
Matty walked quickly, pulling Carolyn behind her.
Matty and Carolyn had made their way to the food court, where the two of them decided to get a late lunch. Carolyn went off in search of a salad, somewhere, while Matty got in line at Wendy's. Their 'burgers weren't nearly as good as Burger King's, and their fries left a bit to be desired as well, but no place else had Frostys!
Someone got in line behind Matty, and a moment later, a voice said, "My red haired sweet, it's you!"
Matty turned around, and was startled / horrified / disgusted to see the face of Taylor Kuntz.
Kuntz looked her over appreciatively. Matty held back from vomiting as best as she could.
"My sweet, aren't you pleased to see me?"
"Pleased isn't the word I'd choose," Matty said with contempt. "Look, can't you understand that I don't like you?!"
"I see that you just can't bring yourself to admit your feelings. I'll make myself worthy of the love you feel you can't show!" He held up in his single gloved hand a bag from Waldenbooks. "I'm going to read all of this romance shi... stuff, and then I'll be a man you can respect!"
"Romance stuff?" Matty repeated. She was worried. Very worried.
"Yeah, some dude named Shakes-something. Wrote a lot of plays."
"Look, I don't care if you memorize every one of his love sonnets, I still won't be interested in you!" Matty exclaimed.
"Excuse me, Miss. Is this jerk bothering you?"
Matty turned and was surprised to see Mike Quadrozzi, standing there in a rage that only Taylor Kuntz could bring out in the otherwise consistently cheerful Boy Scout. Oh, God! Matty thought. Aaron, Bill Gelinas, and Kenny were also with Mike. Why is it that everyone had to pick today to go to the bloody mall?!?!
"I suggest you get out of here, Kuntz," Aaron added. "This isn't camp, so I don't have to worry about holding Squid back. I might even help."
Kuntz backed off, but as he made his hasty retreat, he added, "I'll make myself worthy of you yet, my sweet!"
"God, he makes me sick," Matty commented.
"You okay, Miss?" Mike asked.
"She's kind of hot," Billy whispered to Aaron.
"Hi, Mr. Atanian," Kenny said, looking up from his book slightly.
Mike, Aaron, and Bill face-faulted. "M-m-m-matt?!" Mike stammered.
Billy gagged on something.
"What the hell is that you're wearing?" Aaron added.
Matty had gotten to the counter at last and placed her order. She then turned to the others. "It's not like I enjoy doing this or anything," she told them. "I just needed to look good for Sarah tomorrow."
"Isn't this a bit extreme?" Billy said.
Matty ignored the question, and turned to Kenny. "Incidentally, Kenny, please call me 'Matty' when I'm like this." She lowered her voice a bit. "And just Matt is fine when I'm a guy."
Carolyn came over with her salad just as Matty's order was ready. "Hey, Matty, who're your friends?"
"Some kids from my Troop," Matty said.
Aaron looked at Carolyn with sudden recognition. "Hey, you're Carolyn, aren't you?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"Well, Matt had your picture over the register both years he was the camp Trading Post manager." Aaron explained.
"You did?" Carolyn asked Matty. She sheepishly nodded.
"And he called you every day at camp from the pay phone at the Manor House," Billy added.
"He's always talking about you," Mike contributed.
"Are you, now?" Carolyn asked. "Matty, what are you telling these kids? Corrupting them with strange stories?"
Matty was speechless. Luckily, Mike defended her, saying, "He never said anything bad."
The group made their way towards one of the rare empty tables, and sat down. "So you're all set then for Sunday?" Aaron asked.
"As set as I'll ever be, I think," Matty replied. "So what are you all doing tomorrow?"
"Kirstin actually invited us all over," Aaron said. "Surprisingly, we all got permission to go."
"Isn't that a bit conven..."
"SHUT UP, BILL!"
"We're also hoping that maybe Becker or Swett can make it," Mike added. "Thought it'd be nice to get the whole patrol together."
"Except for Schmuler," Billy said.
"Yes, do want to forget him," Aaron said.
Matty went to take a sip of her beverage, but was surprised to see that where she thought there would be a Sprite in the kind of cup that one normally gets beverages from at a fast food place, there was instead a can. It was a beat up can, but still completely sealed. And it didn't contain Sprite.
"What the hell? Kiwi/Mocha?" Matty said.
"Hey, isn't that the same can...?" Billy asked.
"Yeah," Aaron responded. "How the hell'd it get...?"
Matty tried to pick at the opening. Kiwi / Mocha sounded disgusting... but she was thirsty. She picked at it some more, without success.
"Let me try," Carolyn said, but she, too, had no luck with the can.
"Screw it," Matty said, giving up on the concept of beverages for now. When she got home, she'd just have a double sized glass of iced tea.
They conversed for a while as Matty and Carolyn ate, and then the two of them went their separate ways from the group of boys. They made their way back to Carolyn's house, where Carolyn gave Matty some little tips on makeup (although not a lot, as Carolyn wasn't very big into cosmetics, but neither was Matty) and hair. There wasn't much in the hair department, really, as Matty's hair was on the short side. They then drank a bit from a bottle of sake that the two of them were for some reason working on whenever they got together, despite neither one of them being big alcohol drinkers.
Matty had returned to being Matt (and returned to his regular clothes) before traveling home, and he and Carolyn were back in the centre of Amherst. The bus for Springfield had just pulled up, and Matt and Carolyn embraced before he got aboard.
"Thanks a lot for your help today, Carolyn."
"Any time, Matt. And good luck on your date, tomorrow."
Matt smiled as they hugged again. "Thanks."
With more reluctance then he had then with any of the other things he had done today, he got onto the bus. He looked out of the window at Carolyn as the bus began to pull away.
"Thanks," he said again, although obviously she couldn't hear him at this point. "I'll need it..."
Carolyn and he shared a very special friendship. Matt had once commented to her that their friendship was like a marriage without sex, and that it was. They had shared good times and bad, better and worse, sickness and health, and would be friends at least until death did they part. Matt felt he would be able to share most anything with Carolyn, including a certain after effect of a trip to China not too long ago, something that thus far he had only shared with few other then those who were directly involved.
Matt probably wouldn't even be telling Carolyn, not that he didn't trust her, except that he had an important favour to ask of her, something he could ask of no other living soul on the face of the Earth...
It all started a few days prior...
Matt was going out with Sarah. He was actually going out with Sarah! Well, if one were to be technical, he wasn't the one going out with her, which he now found himself reluctantly explaining to his friends. "Well, it's not exactly a romantic date, or anything," he said slowly, prolonging the inevitable. "It's more a sort-of as-friends thing. It's actually sort of..." He coughed suddenly. "A girls night out."
Mike, Aaron, Kirstin, and the Bills took this in without one bit of shock. They were sort of expecting it. They would have been surprised if it was a romantic date.
"WHAT?" Becker yelled.
Suddenly, a thought occurred to Kirstin. She took Matt aside, where the others couldn't hear, and asked Matt one question that put him into complete and total shock.
"What are you going to wear?"
In the distance, Becker shouted, "WHAT?"
The Boy Scout meeting proceeded with its usual chaotic turmoil. Justy did his usual routine of barking insane orders and attempting to maintain totalitarian control over the other boys. It was futile.
Inevitably, the meeting drew to a close. Matt said goodnight to everyone and made a hasty exit, saying he had some phone calls to make.
Aaron began to make his way outside, closely followed by Mike, Kenny, and the Bills. Kenny walked with his eyes firmly planted in his book, controlling his speed and direction by listening to the others' footsteps.
"Aaron?" a voice called out, just before he reached the door to go outside.
He stopped, his hand poised over the doorknob. Kenny bumped into him, looked up from his book, and apologized.
Aaron turned to see Kirstin, whose meeting had also just ended, heading towards his group. "Hi, everyone," she said as she joined them.
"Did you want something?" he her asked good-naturedly.
"As a matter of fact, yes," Kirstin replied. She pulled from her pocket a deck of cards. Magic cards. She smiled. "Teach me?" she asked.
"S–sure," Aaron responded. Then, "What made you want to learn how to play Magic?"
"Well, you all seem to enjoy it so much," she explained. "After all, you still play it even though you're all cursed in part because of it. I thought it must be a fun game." She frowned. "I fear I can't make much sense of the rulebook, however."
"The rulebook," Mike suddenly decreed, "is not to be understood by normal humans. It's wisdom is wisest used by those who already know how to play."
Everyone looked at Mike as if he'd suddenly grown a third eye. That was an unusually worded comment, even for him.
"In other words," Gelinas said, "learn from people who already know how to play, and just use the rulebook as a reference."
Kirstin nodded. "So that's how it works." She smiled again. "So are all of you free Sunday night?"
Aaron blinked. "Sunday... That's the day that Sarah and Matt... and Matty..."
Kirstin did a simultaneous nod, blink, and smile that caused Aaron's heart to skip a beat. He looked to his friends. "Magic at Kirstin's, Sunday night?"
"Sure!" Mike said.
"If we can," Hughes added in an oddly cheerfully pessimistic voice.
"There a problem?" Kirstin asked Hughes.
"Well," he responded, "this wouldn't exactly be a typical get together with the guys."
It always annoyed the others on those rare moments of clarity in which Hughes said something comprehensible and intelligent.
"That's right." Aaron frowned. "Two women present. No supervision." Aaron's sudden frown deepened.
Mike shrugged. "You never know. It could happen."
Kirstin smiled again, oddly confident. "I'm sure it will. You'll all call me and let me know?" She walked over to the door, smiling at Aaron as she passed him. "Aaron has my number."
Kenny suddenly spoke, startling everyone. "I can make it, fore sure," he said.
"Great!" Kirstin said. "One down, four to go. Sunday!" she said, as the door closed behind her.
Later that night...
"Hello?"
"Hi, Carolyn, it's Matt."
"Oh, hi!"
"Um, I can't talk long. I was just wondering, you busy this Saturday?"
"No. Why do you ask?"
"Um... think I can come over? I've got something to tell you, and a big favour to ask."
"What is it?"
"I'll tell you Saturday. Don't worry, it's nothing evil."
"If you say so."
"I wish I could talk longer, but I have some other calls to make."
"Okay. What time Saturday?"
"The earlier, the better. Noon-ish okay with you?"
"I can deal with that. It'll be good to see you."
"Same here. We should get together more often. I'll take the bus down. Can you meet me in the Centre of Amherst?"
"Sure."
"Well, I gotta go. See you Saturday."
"Okay. Bye. I love you."
"Love you, too, bye."
Matt hung up the phone, doused himself with cold water, and picked up the phone again. As she dialled a number she read off a slightly damp piece of paper, she stirred her iced tea nervously.
"Hello?"
"Um, hello. Is Sarah there?"
"Who's asking?"
"It's Matty Hayes."
"You want to talk to Sarah?"
"Yes."
"One dollar."
"Nicole?" Matty asked.
"Give me a dollar next time you see me."
In the distance, Matty heard, "Nicole? Who's the phone for?"
"Oh, um, here..."
"Hello?"
"Sarah?"
"Matty? Hi! We on for Sunday?"
"Um, of course."
"Good. What's your address? I can pick you up around five if that's good for you."
"Actually... my house can be hard to find. You know a restaurant called Russell's, right on Boston Road?"
"Of course."
"You can pick me up there."
"Okay! See you Sunday!"
Three days later, Matt walked off of a bus in the centre of Amherst. He immediately saw Carolyn. She was an attractive woman, with shoulder length once-blond hair that had darkened in the years since they had first met. As they embraced, two friends who saw each other not nearly as often as either would like, Matt felt some of the tension that had steadily been building within him since Wednesday drain away.
The two of them had first met in high school, when he was a Senior and she a Sophomore. They both agreed that their friendship was one of the best things that they'd gotten out of the time they spent as Springfield Central High School.
Early on, Matt had had feelings for her other then friendship, but the simple fact was that Carolyn's preferences had one thing in common with his own that would prevent anything happening between them: gender. Matt still had "what if" thoughts once every great once in a while, but quickly buried them for three reasons: 1) It would never happen, 2) He was very content with their friendship, and 3) Sarah. (Albeit, the last reason was only a recent one.)
They travelled to the house Carolyn lived in, catching up a bit on the way. It was a large house, a couple of floors to it, and sat upon a very large piece of land. The back yard was dominated by cornstalks, all harvested and waiting for winter to come and go so that they might produce their bounty once again. The house itself wasn't pretty, nor was it ugly. If anything, it had a comfortable, "lived in" look to it.
Carolyn was about to step inside, assuming that Matt was following her. He had stopped at the foot of the steps, however. Realizing this, Carolyn stopped and turned.
"Carolyn, remember my saying that I had something to tell you?"
She looked both concerned and curious. "Yes?"
"It'd probably be simpler to show you. Do you have a hose?"
Carolyn nodded and led him to it. Matt stood in front of her, taking hold of the hose and turning the nozzle that caused cold water to spray from it. He held the hose away from himself, but momentarily that would change.
"Remember that trip to China I took with the Boy Scouts?" Matt asked her. She nodded, and he continued. "While there, the five of us visited an ancient Martial Arts training ground, a ground of cursed springs. If you fall into one of these springs, you... change..." As he spoke, he removed his coat and hat and tossed them aside.
Carolyn looked at him, puzzled. Her puzzlement faded away, and a blank expression replaced it, as Matt turned the hose on himself.
The first thing she noticed was that the water seemed to turn Matt's hair from black to red. She then, almost immediately afterwards, noticed that Matt's body seemed to have changed shape... in certain ways...
Matty stood before Carolyn.
"Matt?" Carolyn said a moment later.
"That's me," Matty responded.
"Oh, my," Carolyn simply said. She calmly sat down on a nearby log and stared off into the corn field.
Matty sat beside her. She's taking this rather calmly, she thought.
The two of them sat, calmly gazing at the cornstalks. A few birds flew by. In the distance, a crow called out. A slight breeze played with Carolyn's hair.
"Fuck!!" Carolyn bolted to her feet, a more then mild look of surprise on her face. "Matt, you're a woman!!"
Matty nodded. "So," she asked, "still no chance for the two of us?"
This seemed to bring Carolyn back down to Earth. Knowing Matty was only joking, she responded, "Well, Matt, I don't know..." She smirked. She had also been joking.
Matty smiled. "Actually, I've assumed the name 'Matty' when I'm female. Matty Hayes."
"So what exactly is going on here?" Carolyn asked. She was definitely over the initial shock, and was asking more for informational purposes then out of confusion.
Matty explained everything to her that she knew about the curse and how it worked. It didn't take long, but by the time they were finished, they were inside and Matty was drying herself off with a towel Carolyn had offered.
"So what was this favour you said you needed?" Carolyn asked after they had sat down.
"Well, there's this woman I like," Matty began.
"Way to go, Matt!" Carolyn said, pleased.
"Yeah, well, she kind of hates me, but she's also sort of becoming friends with 'Matty,'" Matty said. "She doesn't know that Matt and Matty are the same person."
Carolyn nodded, listening as Matty continued.
"Well, she and Matty are going out Sunday night, and, er, I sort of was wondering... well... do you have anything I... I can w... wear...?"
Matty had left her coat and hat at Carolyn's, and through the miracle of public transportation, the two of them made their way to the Holyoke Mall after Carolyn had insisted that Matty should have clothes of her own rather then just borrowing some of hers.
"First, let's go to the lingerie store....this is a date isn't it....wink wink, nudge nudge?"
Matty coughed. "Um... it's more an 'as friends' thing, you know. Anyways, why do I need ladies underwear? It's not as if she's going to see under my clothes..."
"How unlucky. Well, depending on what you wear, you may need a bra, or stockings, or women's undies. I'm not an advocate of that crap, but I would pay me cash money to see you decked out like that!"
Matty was sure her face was probably a rather interesting shade of red, but somehow she found herself persuaded by Carolyn's words. With still a little reluctance, she told Carolyn to lead the way.
Victoria's Secret was pink and plush. It looked to both as though a care bear had wandered in and exploded. It smelled of perfume that only a supermodel would wear for cash or a Home-Ec Teacher would wear in hope of romance.
Matty looked around at all of the frilly and lacy things that were quite alien to her. She looked at Carolyn with a panicked expression. "Help," she peeped.
Carolyn was looking kind of green, frightened, and altogether unhelpful herself. "Here," she mumbled pointing to a chirpy looking saleswoman..."she'll tell us what to do"
Matty looked at the saleswoman, and looked back at Carolyn. "Um, Carolyn...?"
The saleslady, as if on cue walked towards them. The sight was not comforting, she was short, perky looking, and walked with the purposeful swing of someone who knew their way around a pair of panties. "Hello, how may I help you young ladies...perhaps something with a bit of push up 'oomph'?"
Matty reddened again. "I don't need anything fancy... just some girls underwear."
The sales lady looked like she would all of a sudden rather be elsewhere. "Weelllllll...I'm sure you will be able to find your way around without my help.....you're in the right place for WOMENS underwear."
As the saleslady walked away in a pretentious huff, Matty again turned to Carolyn. "So, um... what do you think I'd look good in?" She coughed slightly.
"Green. Redheads always look good in green, or black. No pink...Maybe a nice dark blue or cream colour as well. "
After a moment of thought, she added, "Try to stay away from g-string underwear, it is like having your butt flossed. And I will kill you if you go near the polyester".
Minutes later, they were headed toward the posh dressing room with an armload of cotton underthings.
"Hurry up Matty, all this pink is giving me a headache."
Matty nervously went into one of the gaudy stalls, and began to undress. She was somewhat nervous, as this was her first time undressing in a public place as a woman. She had an odd feeling she was being watched, and quickly ducked her head out of the stall. No one could be seen, but she thought she heard the faint sound of a bell.
A moment later, Matty had slipped into a pair of panties and was attempting to get a bra clasped behind her back, with little success. Perhaps she'd be having better luck if her social life had given her more of an opportunity at undoing the things, but alas this was not the case. Her fingers fumbled over the clasp for the umpteenth time, still without success. With the nervousness that had been with her throughout this entire venture, she called out, "Um, Carolyn, how do I get this thing closed?"
Carolyn opened the door and clasped the bra, only fumbling for a moment.
"Here Matty, let me show you an easier way to do this," Carolyn said as she demonstrated clasping the bra from the front and turning it around.
Matty thanked her. "So, um... how do I look?"
"You look absolutely stunning."
Matty smiled, despite the embarrassment. Carolyn left, and Matty tried on a few other things before picking out a few assorted items. She put her normal clothes back on, and together she and Carolyn went and paid for them. "Well, I suppose now I need something to wear over these," Matty said, holding up the frilly Victoria Secret's bag.
Carolyn and Matty headed for the nearest directory. Already at the directory stood an Asian man dressed in yellow, who had been staring at the multi-coloured plastic for quite some time.
He continued looking at the sign. He tilted his head at a forty-five degree angle hoping that would clarify things. It didn't. He was beginning to visibly fume in anger. It still told him the same thing it had been telling him for the last fifteen minutes: "YOU ARE HERE --> *"
"Great," he said quietly to himself, "I am here."
He began to grit his teeth and Matty and Carolyn were a little surprised when he started to glow slightly...
Matty and Carolyn backed away a bit, just before the man screamed, "SO WHERE THE HELL AM I NOW?!!?" He followed this ten seconds later with a primal scream, and then he screamed "SHISHI HOKOUDAN!!!" There was an explosion.
Matty and Carolyn looked at each other then at the sales clerk whose name tag read "Jason" who was standing in front of the local Electronics Boutique. He just shrugged his shoulders. A second later the melted, charred remains of the mall directory landed behind them. It was their turn to shrug their shoulders and they walked on.
A minute later, the sales clerk who was still standing in front of the store noticed the Asian gentleman in the yellow bandana approaching him. "Ok," he said to himself, "Get into Customer Service mode." He walked up to the young man and said "Hi, is there anything I can help you find today?"
The Asian man in the bandana responded by grabbing the young sales clerk's collar, lifting him off his feet and looking straight into his eyes. "Where is Furinkan High School?"
Matty and Carolyn managed to make their way to Filenes even without the assistance of a directory. They then made their way to the women's department, and there was a saleswoman there who seemed rather unlike the one from Victoria's Secret. This saleswoman seemed like she'd actually be helpful.
She was Asian as well, but didn't seem like she'd be destroying any mall directories any time soon. She had a smile on her face as she watched the two of them approach. She helped close the distance between herself and the approaching customers, going towards Matty and Carolyn with a bouncy walk.
"Hi, I'm Fenny," she said, pushing up her glasses. "Can I help you?"
"Um," Matty said, "I need some clothes."
"Ah, I can definitely help you then. Can I show you some t-shirts perhaps?"
"Actually," Carolyn stated, "she was more looking for some dresses, I think."
"Sure thing!" Fenny cheerily answered. She led Matty and Carolyn to some racks. "You're in luck, we're having a sale today."
Carolyn looked through the racks a bit and pulled out a green halter style top. "What about this? Might go good with some loose black drawstring pants."
"I suppose," Matty said.
Fenny appeared with pants matching Carolyn's description. "You know," she then said, "with your curves, I might also suggest something that clings a bit. There's this short, black silk number that I've been eyeing myself that would look pretty good on you, I think."
Matty nodded, and Fenny walked off again, and reappeared with the dress she had just described. "I think we have a winner," Carolyn said. "Matty, go try 'em on!"
Matty went into the dressing room and tried on the halter top and pants first. She came back out and looked in the mirror. "What do you think?" she asked.
Carolyn gave her approval, as did Fenny. "Now go try on that dress," Carolyn suggested.
Matty returned to the dressing room, and slipped into the dress. She had to leave her men's underwear off, as it would show under the dress, but she was pretty sure she wouldn't have the same problem when she was wearing panties. The dress was a bit low cut in the front, but not too immodest, and clung to her body somewhat snugly. The skirt stopped midway between her hips and knees. It was, Matty thought, a rather nice dress.
She left the dressing room, and again modelled for Carolyn and Fenny. "Nice," Carolyn said.
"I suppose I'll take them both," Matty said. She looked at herself in the mirror, wearing the dress, and was alarmed to find that she found the sight of herself was... well, never mind.
She went to a register and Fenny rang up the purchase. "Thank you very much!" she said.
"Can my friend go back into the dressing room and change into the dress?" Carolyn asked.
"What?" Matty responded.
"Of course," Fenny said. "It's all paid for, so you can do what you'd like with it."
They headed back to the dressing room. "But why?" Matty asked.
"Well," Carolyn said, "you should get used to wearing a dress before tomorrow. Besides... I like how you look in it."
They had reached the dressing rooms, and Carolyn handed Matty the Filenes bag, as well as the Victoria's Secret one.
"Oh, okay," Matty said as she returned to the dressing room.
Their next stop was Filenes' shoe department. Matty was worried about walking in high heals, but luckily Carolyn advised against them, saying she hated heals anyway. The guy in the shoe department, John, was kind enough to suggest some black pumps which matched the dress that Matty was wearing, and also went with the halter top / pants combo she had also bought. "I think these would look good on you," he said. "Hey baby, those shoes will really set you on fire...after I light it up for ya!"
Matty and Carolyn both gave John a quite funny look, but Matty had to agree that the shoes were good, and so she bought them. As she walked away from the register, John watched her and Carolyn walk away.
"Yes, I've made a sale," John said.
And then he laughed.
It was a laugh that Matty thought sounded familiar, like a certain character from a Pioneer anime series, and also like a laugh of a certain SPL.
Matty walked quickly, pulling Carolyn behind her.
Matty and Carolyn had made their way to the food court, where the two of them decided to get a late lunch. Carolyn went off in search of a salad, somewhere, while Matty got in line at Wendy's. Their 'burgers weren't nearly as good as Burger King's, and their fries left a bit to be desired as well, but no place else had Frostys!
Someone got in line behind Matty, and a moment later, a voice said, "My red haired sweet, it's you!"
Matty turned around, and was startled / horrified / disgusted to see the face of Taylor Kuntz.
Kuntz looked her over appreciatively. Matty held back from vomiting as best as she could.
"My sweet, aren't you pleased to see me?"
"Pleased isn't the word I'd choose," Matty said with contempt. "Look, can't you understand that I don't like you?!"
"I see that you just can't bring yourself to admit your feelings. I'll make myself worthy of the love you feel you can't show!" He held up in his single gloved hand a bag from Waldenbooks. "I'm going to read all of this romance shi... stuff, and then I'll be a man you can respect!"
"Romance stuff?" Matty repeated. She was worried. Very worried.
"Yeah, some dude named Shakes-something. Wrote a lot of plays."
"Look, I don't care if you memorize every one of his love sonnets, I still won't be interested in you!" Matty exclaimed.
"Excuse me, Miss. Is this jerk bothering you?"
Matty turned and was surprised to see Mike Quadrozzi, standing there in a rage that only Taylor Kuntz could bring out in the otherwise consistently cheerful Boy Scout. Oh, God! Matty thought. Aaron, Bill Gelinas, and Kenny were also with Mike. Why is it that everyone had to pick today to go to the bloody mall?!?!
"I suggest you get out of here, Kuntz," Aaron added. "This isn't camp, so I don't have to worry about holding Squid back. I might even help."
Kuntz backed off, but as he made his hasty retreat, he added, "I'll make myself worthy of you yet, my sweet!"
"God, he makes me sick," Matty commented.
"You okay, Miss?" Mike asked.
"She's kind of hot," Billy whispered to Aaron.
"Hi, Mr. Atanian," Kenny said, looking up from his book slightly.
Mike, Aaron, and Bill face-faulted. "M-m-m-matt?!" Mike stammered.
Billy gagged on something.
"What the hell is that you're wearing?" Aaron added.
Matty had gotten to the counter at last and placed her order. She then turned to the others. "It's not like I enjoy doing this or anything," she told them. "I just needed to look good for Sarah tomorrow."
"Isn't this a bit extreme?" Billy said.
Matty ignored the question, and turned to Kenny. "Incidentally, Kenny, please call me 'Matty' when I'm like this." She lowered her voice a bit. "And just Matt is fine when I'm a guy."
Carolyn came over with her salad just as Matty's order was ready. "Hey, Matty, who're your friends?"
"Some kids from my Troop," Matty said.
Aaron looked at Carolyn with sudden recognition. "Hey, you're Carolyn, aren't you?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"Well, Matt had your picture over the register both years he was the camp Trading Post manager." Aaron explained.
"You did?" Carolyn asked Matty. She sheepishly nodded.
"And he called you every day at camp from the pay phone at the Manor House," Billy added.
"He's always talking about you," Mike contributed.
"Are you, now?" Carolyn asked. "Matty, what are you telling these kids? Corrupting them with strange stories?"
Matty was speechless. Luckily, Mike defended her, saying, "He never said anything bad."
The group made their way towards one of the rare empty tables, and sat down. "So you're all set then for Sunday?" Aaron asked.
"As set as I'll ever be, I think," Matty replied. "So what are you all doing tomorrow?"
"Kirstin actually invited us all over," Aaron said. "Surprisingly, we all got permission to go."
"Isn't that a bit conven..."
"SHUT UP, BILL!"
"We're also hoping that maybe Becker or Swett can make it," Mike added. "Thought it'd be nice to get the whole patrol together."
"Except for Schmuler," Billy said.
"Yes, do want to forget him," Aaron said.
Matty went to take a sip of her beverage, but was surprised to see that where she thought there would be a Sprite in the kind of cup that one normally gets beverages from at a fast food place, there was instead a can. It was a beat up can, but still completely sealed. And it didn't contain Sprite.
"What the hell? Kiwi/Mocha?" Matty said.
"Hey, isn't that the same can...?" Billy asked.
"Yeah," Aaron responded. "How the hell'd it get...?"
Matty tried to pick at the opening. Kiwi / Mocha sounded disgusting... but she was thirsty. She picked at it some more, without success.
"Let me try," Carolyn said, but she, too, had no luck with the can.
"Screw it," Matty said, giving up on the concept of beverages for now. When she got home, she'd just have a double sized glass of iced tea.
They conversed for a while as Matty and Carolyn ate, and then the two of them went their separate ways from the group of boys. They made their way back to Carolyn's house, where Carolyn gave Matty some little tips on makeup (although not a lot, as Carolyn wasn't very big into cosmetics, but neither was Matty) and hair. There wasn't much in the hair department, really, as Matty's hair was on the short side. They then drank a bit from a bottle of sake that the two of them were for some reason working on whenever they got together, despite neither one of them being big alcohol drinkers.
Matty had returned to being Matt (and returned to his regular clothes) before traveling home, and he and Carolyn were back in the centre of Amherst. The bus for Springfield had just pulled up, and Matt and Carolyn embraced before he got aboard.
"Thanks a lot for your help today, Carolyn."
"Any time, Matt. And good luck on your date, tomorrow."
Matt smiled as they hugged again. "Thanks."
With more reluctance then he had then with any of the other things he had done today, he got onto the bus. He looked out of the window at Carolyn as the bus began to pull away.
"Thanks," he said again, although obviously she couldn't hear him at this point. "I'll need it..."
to be continued...
Disclaimer:
As always, the Jusenkyo curses are used without permission from Ranma ½, as is the character of Ryoga. Thanks to Jason "BoneparteOzaki" Bertovich for some suggestions regarding the Ryoga scene in this installment of Boy Scouts ½.
Jason isn't the only member of a mailing list I belong to who got a cameo appearance in this one. The other two are John "Jinnai" Hoelscher, and the bouncy one herself, Fenny Lin!
As usual, the use of the Boy Scouts in this story was without the consent of the Boy Scouts of America. If they found out about these stories, they'd probably force me to listen to Rap music… or worse! Country! Oh, the horror! Arrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!
Lastly, this story wouldn't have been possible without the contribution of my friend Carolyn Ede. Thank you, Carolyn. Thanks to Montana, too. (The girl, not the state.)
Jason isn't the only member of a mailing list I belong to who got a cameo appearance in this one. The other two are John "Jinnai" Hoelscher, and the bouncy one herself, Fenny Lin!
As usual, the use of the Boy Scouts in this story was without the consent of the Boy Scouts of America. If they found out about these stories, they'd probably force me to listen to Rap music… or worse! Country! Oh, the horror! Arrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!
Lastly, this story wouldn't have been possible without the contribution of my friend Carolyn Ede. Thank you, Carolyn. Thanks to Montana, too. (The girl, not the state.)